October 17 2016
To my journal,
Mum and Dad split up a year ago, and things haven't gotten any better. Fights, tears and money issues plague my houses, like the buildings are attracting destruction. I've kind of gotten used to it now. I guess thats a bad thing, but who cares? Bad things happen all the time.
Ive just started year 8, and its term 3 already. The year has gone by so quickly- it seems like it was only yesterday when I started year 7, my heart beating furiously, my embarrassment levels getting higher and higher as i carried around my pink schoolbag from the year before. Money issues, huh?
I met my besties on the first day, Celia and Maddie, when i was sitting alone in PC, and they came in the door chatting and laughing. I instantly envied them- like they were popular, pretty and were loyal to each other. Then there i was- a sad, lonesome wreck. Anyway, long story short, Celia lost her purse, and i found it, so they asked me to Cold Rock and yeah... we just all hit off, i guess!
They are the best and i love them! But im not that great at talking, so i find it hard to speak to them about Mum and Dad. Sometimes i dont know what to do, and so i end up writing it down in this book. Its NOT a diary- its simply a plain book to sort out how i feel. Duh!
Anyway- Mum and Dad. I know that they are trying not to upset me, but their not great at speaking quietly to each other. In fact, they dont speak- just yell. Its mainly about my little brothers diabetes, and how Dad feeds him 'every sugary thing without thinking', and Mums too 'uptight and stressed'. God. When will they grow up! I hope that i will never be in that kind of relationship. Ever.
Callum Black is the kind of guy that i have, well, a crush on - but doesn't everyone have one! He's so hot and athletic, and has the same interest as me - swimming. We even go to the same club, but he's in the higher class, and at school Callum is in all the lower classes. So he's in none of my classes, which doesn't help me to get to know him more. But there's only one problem- he's such jerk, as he swears and doesn't know the meaning of respect. Nothing will ever come of my crush, so i might as well STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM!
But thats the problem - I can't. Ok. Different subject....sooo....
When I'm at my Dads house for 4 nights, but usually 2 of those nights i spend crying in bed, and at the same time either hating Dad or myself. Usually myself. Its just because Dad is so had to manage and you never know if he's in a mood or not, so i normally feel like I'm trying to be someone Im not around him. Like always fake happy and trying to lighten the atmosphere, as we sit sullenly in front of the TV.
Tom, my one and only sibling, is no help whatsoever, like, he's more heading towards making things worse than right, as he's goes and tells Mum all the stuff that happens at Dads, such as Dad shouting and making me cry. Then they just have another fight when we get dropped off at hers for 9 nights, as Dad works in the mines.
Well, this is the basic nutshell of my life, and really, I hope that this is all I get, in terms of tragedy. But you never know....
