You.

saturday

I'm honestly hoping that none of my friends read my books.

It's hilarious because what they don't know is that I do have a crush.

Hilarious, I know.

It's honestly been so long since I've had a crush that I forgot how it felt.

I've been in denial, to be honest.

It's weird because I had to ask my best friend what it feels like to have a crush. When she mentioned the "signs", I don't know why I immediately thought of your smile.

I honestly don't want to talk to you anymore. Well, no pun intended, we don't talk anymore. Well, chat.

I don't know if this is just a happy crush but I hope it is.

I don't know what I'd do if I really liked you.

Well, you don't like me anymore. I thought it was a relief because before I found these type of feelings out, I only thought of you as a brother.

How stupid of me.

You like someone else. Someone prettier than me. I've never actually thought of myself as a pretty person, anyways.

But why are you giving me signs that you still do? You don't message me anymore and you get mad at me whenever we're in the group chat but we still have playful arguments outside the internet.

To be honest, the first time I ever got jealous was when I found out you liked someone else.

I lent my phone to Jackie* because I was bluetoothing some songs to her. I was showing Kaye* a song that I wrote. Anyways, you walked up to Jackie* and grabbed my phone.

"Patingin ng music, ah!"~

I immediately said "No!" because you might see the things that I have never said to you.

I was a little annoyed but I felt happy because you finally talked to me. You didn't talk to me for a while and you've been avoiding me. Today was the day you actually talked to me.

I was chasing you around and I nearly wrapped my arms around you in order to get my phone.

Kaye* noticed this and even asked you who you really liked. You were speechless and gave my phone back but I looked down because I didn't want to hear your answer.

I know you stopped liking me and I don't know why but I feel like it's better that you don't like me anymore.

Less drama.

For now, I'd like to keep my feelings for you a secret.

It doesn't matter, anyways.

I mean, what would you do if you knew?

a/n:
*names were changed due to me being scared if ever my classmates would read this

~translation:
I'm gonna check out the music in your phone.
-rmj