50 shades of FASCA

50 Shades of shame

Free at last:

" Hey, Kylie Jean Jones... " Tony asked feeling all giddy as he was happy for some unbennoced reason.

" What did you call me? " Kylie asked with her eyebrow raised. Only Maya and the girls could call her that.

" Kylie Jean Jones "

" Why did you call me that? "

" I just assumed that you'd let me call you that as you let Maya and the other girls call you that. " Tony said completely serious.

" And are you a girl? " Kylie asked.

" No, at least I don't think am. I mean lately I haven't been questions my gender. " Tony contemplated.

" What about..."

" I SWEAR TO GOD TONY IF YOU KEEP ON TALKING I WILL LITERALLY THROW YOU OUT. LIKE I WILL GET OUT OF MY CHAIR, PICK YOU UP AND THROW YOU OUT OF MY AREA UNDERSTOOD."

" I find that hard to believe as I am taller and heavier than you. "

" Well then... other coming to question your gender, what do you need? "

" I need your science textbook." Tony asked. Kylie nodded as she handed over her science textbook. Suddenly Tony sees a suspicious looking grey book. He lifts out laughing.

" Are you serious, you gotta be fucking kidding me. " Tony said laughing as he clutched his stomach.

" What? " She asked as she tried to find what he misplaced.

" You have 50 Shades of grey. " Tony says finally calming himself down. " This is gold. Wait until I tell the whole office."

" So..."

" Its fifty freaking shades of grey. The Joke writes itself. " Tony said laughing again. " Hi, I'm Kylie and I write poorly written smut. "

" You know, I would be more embarrassed if I wasn't being made fun of by the guy who watched..."

" DON'T YOU FUCKING GO THERE. "
" Pornography. " She finished her sentence and snickered.

" Ok you just went there. " Tony said sighing. " I didn't even watch it that time. "

" That's what you get for fighting fire with fire. " Kylie said once again snickering. " If you can't handle it then don't fight with the dragon. "

" Wait till I fight back... " Tony whispered to himself. Soon he saw Brooklyn and Denis walking down the hall.

" Did Mason actually tend to Lucas's needs? " Denis asked curious.

" I don't think it's true but it's possible. " Brooklyn replied back.

" Still I don't ship it. " Denis said. Then soon after Tony came in screaming.

" LOOK WHAT I FOUND. " Tony said after panting.

" 50 Shades of Grey? " Brooklyn asked confused.

" So you read poorly written smut directed toward female audiences. " Denis asked Tony.

" SEE " Tony yelled towards Kylie. " Wait what, you must be misunderstanding me. This isn't- "

" No don't be ashamed," Denis said as he went to place a hand on Tony's shoulder. " It's ok Tony, we all know it's yours. Its ok to show your real colors. Don't hide who you really are."

"Seriously this isnt mine. Kylie tell'em it's yours. " Kylie glances at him as she ignores him and resumes to homework.

"Be true to yourself." As Denis mock sighs. "You're in a no judgment zone. We all have different interests, even if some are more," Denis glances down at the book, "special than others."

"No, really. I don't read this and I don't watch porn."

Denis gave Tony a look. As if we didn't believe him.

"Often," Tony quickly amends.

"..."

"Not at work," Tony clears his throat. "Never at school."

"I understand if you're just little bit different. We're an inclusive community here, we celebrate differences. See, we're a diverse group of people with diverse interests." Denis gazes out over the office, sweeping an arm through the air. "Like, take Morgane for instance, she has a fetish for Steven Universe."

"Hey, there it's a great show," Momo calls from his desk.

"Mara has a chronic betting problem," Denis points at him.

"Just because I win all the time does not mean I have a problem."

"Isabella wants to get into Justin's pants. But she'd probably be arrested for rape"

"You're lucky Justin's at school right now," Bella mumbled embarrassedly.

Tony, Denis, and Brooklyn stared.

"...and I don't want to get into his pants," Bella covers his face and slowly sinks back down into his chair.

"See, we're all fucking unique snowflakes," Denis whips around to face Tony again. "Even if some are little more fucked up than unique."

"Okay I can't tell if that was supposed to be inspiring or insulting. Also this is getting really old-"

"So be proud of yourself," Denis talks over Tony and jabs an index finger into his chest. "Run to the nearest mountain clutching 50 Shades in one hand and your porn in the other and yell, 'I am a porn fanatic! And I am proud!'"

"You really can stop now-"

"Let it ring from the curvaceous slopes to the stone mountains," Denis's eyes grow starry.

"Stop-"

"Let it ring from the snowcapped Rockies to the heightening Alleghenies! Let it ring from every hill and molehill, from every mountainside, let it ring!"

Tony pounds the book against his forehead.

"And when that happens," Denis shakes Tony lightly and drops his voice. "When you let out your love for porn, when you let it ring from every village, and every hamlet, from every state, and every city, you will be able to sing, 'Free at last! Free at least! Thank Denis Gurcan, I am free at last!'"

Tony lets out a muffled scream.

"Yeah, like that, just be a little clearer. Okay, that was enough motivational speech giving for today," Denis claps Tony on the shoulder.

As he steps around Tony, he thumps his fist against his chest, touches his fist to his lips, and then slowly raises it as a peace sign in the air. "Keep on living brother. Keep on watchin'. Keep on doin' what you love to do."

"That was actually inspirational," Brooklyn marvels as they walk away.

Tony runs into Kylie's desk, slams the book onto his desk, and storms out. He then returns a second later, grabs the science textbook, and storms out again.

"The joke writes itself," Kylie calls after him.

~○~

Mara wandered into Kylie's study area, opens a drawer and plucks out a bill.

"You're just taking the fifty right," Kylie calls from his computer.

"Yeah," Mara walks over and waves it in front of Kylie's face.

"I cannot believe Tony took the bait."

"Which is why I'm now 50 dollars richer," Mara smiles as he slides the bill into her breast pocket.

"Whatever, I'll get you back eventually."

"Keep dreaming, I've won nine times against you already," Mara picks up the book. "And I'm going to take this back."

"The book?" Kylie watches Mara flip through the pages. "Damn, I kind of wanted to read it."

"I'll lend it to you after I'm done," Mara waves as he enters the hallway.