What If My Dream...Does Not...Happen...

The Orpheus Of Deppression

Tyler perched himself on the highest branch of the tree in his back yard, ukulele in one hand and a crown of flowers in the other. As soon as he squirmed around into a comfortable situation upon the branch, he carefully placed the crown on his head and rested the stringed instrument on his lap. He looked down at its all too familiar wooden color and became partly limp. He had faked so many feelings that at this point he was too tired. Too many emotions to play as. "...I miss you, Josh." Tyler spoke in softly mumbled words. He looked down on the wood carvings cased in his instrument as he said this. His eyes were stinging but he rubbed and ignored them. He wrought out his arm and glanced at his watch. Eleven fifty nine, it said. "Almost time..." he whispered to the open air around him.

And he waited thirty seconds, looking at the trailing wood of the brand he was sitting on go out in smaller connected vein-like twigs. How intricate they were, going on to the leaves but not stopping there. It was a metaphor for him. Even if you get really far, you still have a ways to go if you want to reach for greatness. Josh told him that. Josh's voice upon telling him such stuck in Tyler's head like a recorded memory and that's what kept him fighting. Josh's voice and his words. He promised Josh he would grow and try until he wasn't able to at all. Which would be death if he could help it. He heard twelve small beeps come from his wrist and grinned widely. On the twelfth chirp, rain began to drip from the lush green leaves above him and pummel him with small bullets of cold wetness. "Oh good, rain!" He said, a wave of déja vu crashing onto the beaches of his mind. He picked up the instrument in his lap and started strumming useless notes. They were mixed and jumbled, just like the emotions in his head. After a mix of boring cords, he got into rhythm with a beat that silenced the entire town. He was known as the Orpheus of Fairview.

He got a little carried away with his words. At first, he stammered and stuttered on each and every lyric he sang, but with repetition, and self reassuring, he ended up screaming the lyrics. They were so powerful with each waking vocal that many people stopped where they were and mourned. They cried for their misfortunes and depressing, negative moods washed over the face of many. "DON'T WANNA KNOW, WHO I, WOULD BE..."

"WHEN I WAKE UP, FROM A DREAMERS SLEEP..."

He screamed and yelled these lyrics, he didn't wanna just be heard any more his voice had said enough. He wanted to be LISTENED to. He wanted someone to voice back to him and let him know they were there. He wanted to have someone answer the door of open minds he had been knocking on for so long. Townspeople cried, they screamed for mercy upon god as all their hardships had flooded from their mouths and their pleads for death became louder and louder. "FUCK, BABY, WE'LL MAKE MONEY SELLING YOUR HAIR..." he screamed, sobbing with each syllable. He honestly didn't want to be living. The pain from screaming was too much but my god he thought, I have to keep singing. "BUT I DON'T FUCKING CARE WHAT'S IN YOUR HAIR I JUST WANNA KNOW WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND, I USED TO SAY I WANNA DIE BEFORE IM OLD BUT BECAUSE OF YOU I MIGHT THINK JUST TWICE MORE, BABY." The sobs of children, women, and men alike were shaky and depressing with each note.

But soon, after six more repeats, his voice was too tired, his mouth too strained and his throat too sore, so he stopped. The memories flooded back. The whole entire reason he even bothered coming to the tree. Josh. He had come to this tree for Josh...