A broken girl

Im in heaven, I couldn't believe my eyes. I have the perfect life I could want I have my happy family with me we're all laughing and having a good time having lunch in our new mansion.

Suddenly something called out my name and all my dreams vanished and im to this hell hole i call home. This one tight room I feel like I'm suffocating, its sad how I just came back from a big Mansion to this tiny room .oh wait ! that was just a dream a dream I could only wish for.

My name is Kalia, I'm 15 almost 16 I think. I live in the capital city of Somalia, Mogadishu with my family I have a baby sister name Mella, she's 3.

My mom has been affected by HIV AIDS. My drunken father has stripped her of her life. My mom Salma is the most beautiful person I know inside and out. I love her with all my heart.

On the other hand my father Ahmed is the worst person I know I don't know how my mother ended up with him.  After everything he has put her through she still loves him; I wish I could have a forgiving heart like her's.

Now my mother is dying and even though its my father's fault she's dying he's never around. Maybe he's with his other wife. So I'm here taking care of my mom and my sister.

It's midnight I just woke up to check up on my mom because she usually pukes blood at this time. I can hear her call my name, I went over to her side of the floor she was sleeping on, it was filled with blood.

I panicked but I didn't want to show it,  my mom could read my facials though. She said "Kalia my dear don't worry I'm alright" I shook my head and said "I know mama I know" and tears fall down my eyes I quickly covered it.

I cleaned her up and I put her to sleep . Mella was asleep so I just went back to sleep.

I woke up early in the morning I did my usual routine, I went early in the morning and begged for money.

It seems like its going to be a good day cuz I got more money than usual. I bought bread and eggs and fetched some water from the stream.

After I got home I started cooking. Mela came running to me excitedly and I was so confused I chuckled and asked "what has got you so happy?"  she answered "we have eggs!!!" with a very big smile.

Now I see why she was so happy, usually we can't afford eggs so I was really happy that i put a smile on her face.

I finished cooking the eggs. I put them on a plate and placef them next to where mom was laying down.

Me and Mella sat next to her and started eating. That day was truly the best day ever. We laughed and talked then my father joined us.

Thank God he wasn't drunk. He  sat with us and we had  the best talks ever. I looked at my mom and I could see the big smile on her face .I like how this was so similar to my dream and I liked how mom seemed to be getting better.

As usual I tucked  Mella and mom to bed and as obviously dad went out.

I went to my side of the floor and I rested my head on the floor and i slowly closed closed my eyes and started dreaming.

when I opened my eyes I realized it was daylight. I haven't checked on my mom all night cause I was lost in my dream. 

l felt guilty so I rushed to moms side of the floor and I could see there's no sign of blood I sighed , I felt relieved.

I saw that  mom seemed so peaceful and happy so I decided not to wake her up.

Mella was already awake and I didn't want her to disturb mom. So I told Mella to come with me so we can beg for money together.

Today we didn't get as much as yesterday but we got enough to buy bread . We went home and placed a bread on a plate.

I saw that mom was still sleeping. I was happy and worried at the same time.I was happy because she has never slept like this in a long time. I didn't know why I was worried though.

  After i got everything ready I went to wake up mom. I shook her hand and I noticed how her hands were freezing.

I felt something hitting me in the head, I immediately cleared it with deny. She couldn't be dead I shook her whole body harder and harder.

There was no sign of life in her. My eyes filled with tears I screamed and screamed then I blacked out.

I opened my eyes, my head is beating hard. I was hoping everything I just experienced was just a dream.

My neighbor Fatuma came and held my head and said "Are you okay my child?" I tried replying but it seems like everytime I try to talk I cry so she just held me in her arms until i fell asleep.

I woke up again and  I started thinking things over.  I blamed myself leaving my mother the whole night with out checking up on her.

I started questioning myself 'what if'? I could have saved my mother's life but I'm unfortunately I was too busy in my unrealistic world. I will never dare to dream again.