Don't Touch Me (A Joe Sugg Fanfiction)

Chapitetier Four

Being a fangirl of a lot of things, I didn't want to judge. At twelve I might have been like one of them, screaming and crying with makeup dripping down my face, but now I just found them annoying. As Caspar waved at them they all screamed hysterically, making my eardrums pound. Caspar approached me and started talking with me, and he seemed like a genuinely nice guy. 

"Thanks for getting everything all set up for me." He said and smiled warmly.

"No problem, you usually get this many people?" 

Caspar looked outside and thought for a second, "Yeah around this usually, I kinda hate it."

I looked at him coldly, and he must have noticed my shift in mood because he hurried to correct himself.

"I love meeting my fans." Caspar explained, "But they have to wait for a long time to see me for a minute, that doesn't seem fair, you know?"

"Nope, I don't know, seeing as I don't have millions of fans." I said with a smile.

Caspar laughed and a security guard walked up to him. I took this as my cue to leave, and I walked back over to the shelves where Joe was hidden. Joe had set up his camera with his microphone, and was already recording Caspar. 

"Hey." He said casually, as if he filmed people secretly everyday.

"Hey." I whispered back, careful not to speak too loud to mess up the recording. Joe picked up on this and turned to me again, while keeping the camera steady.

"You can talk to me, I always voice over this part explaining what I'm doing, it's all good."

"Oh ok." I said relieved and I saw another one of Joe's cameras sitting on the shelf. 

He saw me looking and his eyes lit up as if he had an idea. "You wanna get some shots for me if you're not busy?"

"Sure." I said, as I had basically nothing to do, and it could help Joe out and he seemed genuinely like a nice person, plus it could help us with bookstore promo.

When I walked around with the camera and turned it and hit record Caspar walked up, and then looked surprised by the camera in my hands. "Why do you have a vlogging camera?" He asked me.

I quickly made up a lie, "My boss  wants me to take videos of this, because it's good promotion for the bookstore." Not convincing enough, I thought to myself, but Caspar seemed to buy it. 

"Oh okay!" He said, and he smiled at the camera and gave a thumbs up. I knew Joe would be trying not to laugh. 

"I'm going to go record the fans and stuff." I said and awkwardly shuffled away, holding my laugh in to the point where it hurt.

 This was exciting and fun, and I suddenly understood why Joe enjoyed pranks. I walked over to the fans and held the camera discreetly as I could in front of me. They all looked anxious clutching their books to their chests. Their books.

That's when it hit me. Joe's prank would be a fail, because Caspar was signing books that viewers brought in. The display was just for people who wanted to buy books, but most of these crazy fangirls already had theirs. My heart started beating fast, as I walked back inside quickly and went into the bookshelves where Joe was hidden and told him. 

"Shit." He said, and seemed stressed. But I was determined his prank wasn't going to be a fail. 

"Come with me." I said and grabbed his hand and dragged him into the back room, after looking carefully to make sure that Caspar wasn't looking.

"Now probably isn't the time-" Joe started. I gave him the ultimate stink eye.

"-Trust me." I said and I grabbed one of Caspar's display books, and a box cutter.

"What are you doing?" Joe asked.

I faced him. "I have an idea how to save this prank." 

"How?" He asked me quizzically. 

"I'm going to hollow out the inside of the book and fill it with something nasty, and we'll try to get him sign it."

Joe smiled at me. "That could work."

"Now we just need something gross." I said. "Can you fit in the book?"

"Ha ha." Joe said sarcastically as he tried not to smile and failed. I stopped to think and Joe bit his lip, deep in thought. 

"Anything near here that would work? A store or something?" He asked.

"Just a chinese market that sells like crickets and stuff."I said absentmindedly.

Joe raised an eyebrow.

Before I knew it I had snuck Joe out of the bookstore past the fans and to the market, with the hollowed out book hidden in his sweatshirt. We walked in, and the cashier cheerfully greeted us.

I walked up the the woman at the counter and asked her for crickets. She looked confused for a sec and then smiled. "Good protein. I will go get crickets for beautiful couple." 

She walked to the back room smiling to herself.  Couple. Neither of us bothered to correct her, and we were both flustered. Joe walked up to the counter and drummed his fingers on the counter top. 

"Thanks for saving the prank Rory." He said looking relieved. "I don't know what I would have done without you."

"How do you know I'm not working with Caspar to prank you?" I said and made a strange face at him. He and I were laughing as the cashier walked back out, with a bag of sea salt and vinegar crickets. She rang us up, and Joe and I both got our wallets out at the same time. He put his hand on mine and pushed it down away from the cashier and grabbed his wallet.

"I got this."

"No you don't it's fine Joe, don't be ridiculous." I said as I took out a ten.

"My dad always told me to pay for the girl on the first date." Joe said, and I looked away flustered, and he succeeded in paying. As we got outside I pulled Joe into the alleyway quickly.

"The fans Joe you idiot!" I said and looked around. None of them had seen luckily, and they were all still standing on tiptoe trying to catch a glimpse of Caspar. In my rush to get Joe away from fans I got really close to his face and we both blushed and stepped away from each other.

"Oh right." Joe said. "I kinda forgot about them for a second there."

"So what's the game plan, who's going to give Caspar the book?"

Joe looked at me.

"No I can't do it, he's already met me!" I told him.

"Caspar would recognize me on sight!" Joe said, "I can't do it!"

I turned away from Joe and paced a couple of feet thinking. As I thought, he dumped out the crickets inside of the hollowed out book.

"Rank." was Joe's only comment, and I suddenly had an idea.