The dance project: YouTube boyband

Chapter 17

It was a bad camera angle.

I looked fat.

I looked ugly.

My forehead was too big.

My hair was knotted and tangled.

Many of the comments on the video just said bad things about me and I could see them. It wasn't just my mind - the imperfections were there. The viewers were the biggest critics analysing me top to toe telling me how disgusting I was. And I knew I was.

Joe had really annoyed me because he knew this would and had happened and he didn't stop it. He didn't save me. He just left me to be eaten by the sharks.

I sat on my sofa watching Netflix eating a huge tub of ice cream - it was like a breakup except with my confidence.

I heard the a knock at my front door which was probably Drew had locked himself out. I hauled myself up and headed for the door.

On my way I walked past our mirror and looked at myself. I was in my pyjamas with my hair in a lop sided bun and mascara all over my face.

I was a mess.

I was all the things they said.

Without thinking I punched the mirror - hard. Shards flew everywhere and my knuckles began to bleed but I felt no pain. Who cared about the seven years bad luck for smashing a mirror?

Quickly the door went again bringing me back to realisation knowing Drew was at the door. I ran into the bathroom grabbed loads of toilet paper to hide the bleeding and wrapped in around my hand.

I went to the door and opened it expecting to see Drew but instead I saw Caspar. I was surprised and soon realised I was a mess.

"You ok Chlo?" He asked as he opened his arms for a hug. I took his offer and he gave me a huge hug.

He gave good hugs. Warm and cosy. Comforting and friendly.

"No," I cried into his chest.

"It's ok," he whispered.

"Come on let's go in." I said and led him in but before I could go in he spotted my hand.

The blood had come through the tissue and red was coating the white surface. He gently lifted my hand and gave me a look to ask what I had done. He seemed sympathetic. He seemed like he was there to support me.

"I punched a mirror," I sighed.

He didn't say a word just followed me in to the kitchen where we sat at the kitchen table.

"Let me help you with that," he smiled as he began unravelling the tissue revealing beneath the cuts and my blood stained knuckles. "Oh Chlo!" Caspar gasped as he saw the damage. It was quite bad.

"I'm fine,"

"When a girl says I'm fine- it means the opposite! Do you not think I know that? I live with Joe!" He laughed. "Where do you keep all medical things and bits and bobs?"

"That cupboard," I pointed with my good hand. He headed over and grabbed out some real bandaging and some anti septic stuff you were meant to put on cuts.

"I don't know what I'm doing but I'll try!" He giggled. He began by dipping some cotton pads in the antiseptic. As he gently touched my cut with the cotton pad I gasped as it stung. "I'm so sorry!" He shouted.

"It's ok, it will help." I said through gritted teeth.

"Look, I came over because I knew something was wrong when you left rehearsal early. It wasn't like you! Is it the hate comments on Joes video because if it was I will have something to say to them!"

"It was, but they are right. All the things they say! It's true. I'm fat. I'm ugly. And Joes too good for me."

"Stop!" Caspar shouted seriously. After a couple of seconds he began giggling. "Sorry I can't stay serious, anyway, I promise you they are so jealous! And I know it's easy for me to say it when I'm not the one receiving it. Did you read any of the positive comments?" He asked.

"No, there weren't any!"

"There were!" He laughed. He finished wrapping my knuckles and pulled his phone out.

"Ok how about this one, she is beautiful, can't wait to see the project!" He said looking at me for approval.

"It was probably Drew," I smiled.

"Yeah because Drew is called kawaii girl 202 isn't he?" He laughed.

He began to read out more positive comments and they kept coming.

"I'm going to tell those haters!" He began replying to the hate comments saying things like "I don't think she is," or "you're wrong."

Quickly replies kept flooding in saying things like "sorry Caspar!" Or "it was only a joke!"

People didn't want to offend Caspar Lee.

It did make me feel better in my own weird way.

"And Chloe no matter what anyone tells you, you are beautiful, gorgeous, stick thin and have an amazing personality. Don't let the haters get you down because they are just trolls sat behind a computer screen having nothing better to do with their life. You have your life sorted and you should be so proud of yourself."

"Thank you Caspar," I blushed.