Don't Speak

October/My Late Night Thoughts

I don't know why but every time I do something wrong, somehow I get the blame.
It's as if I'm not human. Some days I just feel like giving up. I try my best but everything seems to fade away.
I'm sorry, I can't be perfect. Nobody is perfect.
Every little thing is my fault. It takes a lot to get to know me. Only a selective few know the real.
What did I do to disappoint you? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Yet we breathe in the same air. Sometimes I just need to get something's off of my chest.
There is a lot I need to confess. I make mistakes but who doesn't? My insomnia is only getting worst. I'm tied down between reality and a nightmare.
Every single moment is a moment to live. Even with the brightest light bulb in the world won't change me. I'm the stupid girl who everyone apparently loves. I don't hate myself because I hate the fact I never really gave much thought of what exactly is wrong with me. I think about this a lot but nobody seems to notice. Or care.
I don't know why but half of me was dead and the other half of me is alive. For whatever reason, I was born lucky. If I was so lucky, why isn't my name but anything but lucky? Was I lucky or just delusional? Theories that haunted me. I'm loved by someone. I want to break free from its talons. Yet, I sit and pout because one of my favorite bands has broken up. It's holding me down and it's refusing to let it go.