It's all I wished for when it happened
I just wanted to scream
But I guess apologies can no longer help me
I wasted all I had and no amount of apologies
Is gonna help me now that it's too late
I get it I messed up yet again
But couldn't you at least leave me to scream
No words are coming out of my mouth
And yet I'm screaming
There's a storm in my head
Wind howling, thunder roars
Screams are heard but its all inside my head
And yet you can hear none of it
I just wanted to scream because of all this doubt
And all this hurt, I just want it out
All I wanted for it to do was get the fuck out
But it's now trapped inside me in my head
Who do I blame though when it was all my fault?
I could have been faster
I could have been stronger
I could have stopped earlier
I could have screamed it away
But now I just have a painful reminder
Carved into my skin, to stay there forever
Words haunting me in the dark tryina get to me
But what use is it when I can't even say it
No words no sound I can't get it out
Soaked in self loathing, it's silly
I'm really a sheep in wolf's clothing
But who's there to see it?
When no one wants me.
Crying my eyes out as I dig into my skin
It's sick and I need therapy, but who's to judge me
When no one is there to know my story
You fuckers are not ready, you're gonna leave me
No fuckers I'm not sorry for saying this
The moment I stop being funny
Ya'll are gonna pack up and leave
You don't know me
And I cannot say that enough
Simple as that once you stop being funny they start packin'
Well pack your shit and leave 'cause I dont give a shit.
I'll just tune it out and scream oh wait no can't do that
My voice is frozen and my mouth open wide
I can't hold it but it's still stuck inside
All the apologies in the world couldn't help me now
And I tried saying goodbye but what's the use
When they bring you back every time.
I could have been faster
I could have been stronger
I could have stopped earlier
I could have screamed it away
But now I just have a painful reminder
Carved into my skin, to stay there forever
Words haunting me in the dark tryina get to me
But what use is it when I can't even say it
No words no sound I can't get it out
Soaked in self loathing, it's silly
I'm really a sheep in wolf's clothing
But who's there to see it?
When no one wants me.
You keep telling me I'm a fighter but is that so?
I'm gonna explode any minute
Don't you tell me to stop screaming,
'Cuz I don't know when the next time will be.
And the next time I can't scream can probably be the last
Because I'm hanging on the edge and I can see the line
I'm way past my limit like a desperate drunkard
All I wanted to forget but only it was all ficton
And all you really get out of it is an addiction
You can fight it you can try but make sure to say your goodbye
Because the more time you spend sober
The easier it gets for you to die
Whatever, it's not like I havent been through this before
It's all just a repetition of what has already been
Quit tryina save me because it's as useless as it gets
You can't save a person when you are about to leave
So I bid my farewell to all you suckers
'Cuz I can already see you leave
I could have been faster
I could have been stronger
I could have stopped earlier
I could have screamed it away
But now I just have a painful reminder
Carved into my skin, to stay there forever
Words haunting me in the dark tryina get to me
But what use is it when I can't even say it
No words no sound I can't get it out
Soaked in self loathing, it's silly
I'm really a sheep in wolf's clothing
But who's there to see it?
When no one wants me.
No apologies anymore guilt overflowing
Words stuck in my throat
Words carved in my skin
Whether willing or not
I'm going to leave
But maybe not right now
I'm just gonna wait for you to leave,
You can see that I'm wounded,
And I can see you aren't here to heal
You're here for the kicks
When I just needed sympathy
Whatever, I can't expect to be great
When all I started out as was a mistake.
