Undercover Lesbian Stripper

HaRdCoRe ShOpPeRs

Chapyter 10

Tara's POV



Three weeks. Three uneventful weeks. I don't know how much more I can take this. I know I have to be patient but I feel like I have been set up and I'm at a dead end. I report to Selena and James whenever I can. They haven't heard anything either. So far this entire mission is as dead as my pet goldfish, Mr. Goldenstein. Had to flush the little feller down the toilet. RIP Mr. Goldenstein, you will be missed. A moment of silence please. (a/n: Mr. Goldenstein 2005-2005 <3)

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Thank you. Anyway, I was now shopping with Blair. I thought it was grocery shopping, but apparently we have enough food to last us through the Zombie Apocalypse, and their is some crazy 30 minute sale at the mall. I don't understand, why can't they have this crazy sale online. I would much rather sit down instead of walk around. Which is probably one of the reasons why most Americans are super fat.... I'm not sure.......

but we are prepared. We have our shoulder bags tightened to our bodies, our wallets secure, pepper spray, a stink bomb, silly string, a mini tazer, a pen lazer, and fake mustaches. I don't know why we have the last one, but it was on sale at the prank store. We walk into the mall looking all badass with our dark ripped skinny jeans, tank top, leather jacket, converse, and black sunglasses. Al the stores are still closed but we have snatched a mall map and took a seat in the corner. "Ok. So we need ot find the quickest way around the mall in 30 minutes so we can snatch all of the best deals and the bestest clothes." Blair was taking this even more seriously than I was. I was pretty sure she has been preparing for this like Gabby Douglas trains for the olympics. "We can go to Forever 21, Hot Topic, H&M, American Apparel, then Hollister." I was pretty sure that was good. We would be covering the left side of the West Wing. Blair thought about this like it was between life and death. "No. We can't. No doubt most people are going to go to those first. The best things are for when they restock when the first rush is gone. We should hit Macey's, Nordstrom, Juicy Couture, The Body Shop, and Victoria's Secret" She had a point, since the most people were getting these shops we could get the others. "Alright then, we hae a plan." We spent the next five minutes planning our schedule. One person would get in line and the other would shop, then switch places. It would get us out of the strores in six minutes tops. "Attention shoppers, all stores will be open in five minutes to commence our annual 30 minute sale." Blair and I looked at each other and prepared ourselves for the worst. "It's go time" we said at the same time and got up made our way to the opposite side. Most people were rushing to the side that we were coming from, we definately had the best plan. We decided to skip Macey's and Nordstrom and go to the more...valuable ones.

When we came to Juicy Couture there was barely any crowd. Which was good, since we knew what we wanted we could be in and out. You could still see people rushing around to get to their final destinations and others were jogging in place and we're wearing track suits and granny packs. And I thought we were being serious. We were planning for the Hunger Games and they were training for the Olympics. It was insane, but it also gave me a huge rush. "ALRIGHT SHOPPERS ON YOUR MARK GET SET, YOU HAVE 30 MINUTES, GOOOO!!!"
I was trampled by crazy people and died.

And that was the sad, tragic death of Tara Swann (aka. the badass butt kicking superhero) RIP



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Jk. But I did see my life flash before my eyes until Blair pulled me into Juicy Couture and we started running around. 5 minutes later, we are running out with our bags rushing next door to the Body Shop. There were so many great deals, I got almost every body lotion and only spent $27 in only 4 minutes. When we came out of Victoria's Secret with yet another bag filled with 3 bra's, 5 pairs of underwear, and 2 sweatpants, we had 15 minutes left. Overall we were still making good time. We sprinted to the other side and decided to split up for the last 13 minutes. Blair went off to who knows what and I went straight for Hot Topic. I got a few tops and rushed over to Forever 21. Not seeing anything with my interest I sprinted over to American Apparel. I got a vintage top, leggings, and high waisted shorts. For the last 3 minutes I decided to go to Hollister. I was reaching for a tank top when someone else reached for it too. Not only was it the last medium, but I already knew where this was going to go. "Let go pretty bitch. I was here first!" I was kinda confused with just about everything he just said. "Umm, correct me if I'm wrong, but you just mesed that entire insult up." "Excuse me!" I sighed, is this top even worth it. "Well, you said 'let go pretty bitch', but your supposed to say 'ugly bitch', that's what makes the insult. But since you called me ugly I can't be insulted, but I should be a little flattered." She looked extremely confused, so I just dropped the top and walked away and paid for the tops and skinny jeans I already had. That 'argument' took up too much time so I had to rush to the alread long line. Since, it's pretty easy for me to go un-noticed, while two women were fighting I stealthily got in front of them. I paid for the clothes just as the 30 minutes were up and the women behind me were beyond pissed. Not at me, since they had no idea, but by the fact that if they wanted those clothes, that weren't meant for their generation, they were gonna have to pay full price. 

I met up with Blair by the Starbucks. Blair got a hot chocolate and I got a Java Chip. We sat down, and let me tell you it felt good. I had a sip of my drink and moaned, it was so refreshing and I really needed that. "Maybe next time I can be the one to make you moan." I disregarded the comment from behind me, but judging from the fact that there were other manly chuckles, he was in a group. How immature. "Maybe, but I don't think it'll be as good." His friends ohh'd and Blair looked like she was constipated, I do admit that was pretty good. A few minutes later, they were gone and Blair was on the floor crying. I had a less than pleased expression on my face and ignored all of the looks that said they were not to secretly questioning our mental health. Blair and I finally made a hike with our 10 bags each and stuffed them into the back seat and trunk. When we got into the car, I knew hse was gonna say something about our previous encounter with those ignorant mysterious boys. But, when we started driving I was surprised she hadn't yet said anything. I spoke to soon because at the 4th red light. She looked over at me, "Sooo, those boys were hot right?" I looked over at her, is she serious. Doesn't she have a boyfriend. "I wouldn't know. And don't you have a boyfriend?" She gave me a flat look, as if I was supposed to know what she was thinking. "Don't change the subject. And what do you mean, 'I wouldn't know', you didn't look over at them once?" With a straight face I said 'nope'. She shook her head and continued driving. When we got to our condo, we had our bags delivered to our room, since we were way to tired to do it outselves. And 30 minuets later we had a living room covered in clothes, chinese, and Bad Girls Club playing on TV. We were too tired ot put the clothes away, so we just said we'd do it tomorrow. And no matter how much I tried, I couldn't get, not two, guys out of my head. 

The mall mystery guy, and as usual, Blake Hunter.

I HAVE TO PACK *SIGH*

(NEW COVER!!!)

Txx