when it's gone

missing her

without her here life seems empty pointless, it doesn't matter how good your friends are or how much they try to make you feel better it makes it worse. it's been months since it happened and I've already tried other relationships, I don't know if it was out of curiosity to see how she'd react or to give me something of anything to look foward to in life, to give me the push I needed. But every time I think of her the voices fill my head saying that I'll never be able to get her back, that she hates me and it starts to break me down. Even when you think of the happy times all you can do is cry because it reminds you of what you don't have anymore, you miss everything about the person, I miss everything about her. it's the way they look at you, i mean she had eyes and when she looked at you and you would look back there was just something about those eyes. their smile, she was always smiling always happy except eventually it seemed I was the only thing taking that smile away. it was the way they would act, she used to sing to me all the time and dance in my arms and when she let her voice out, she was the most beautiful and it made me so proud no it just makes me cry. it was the way they'd kiss and hold you, she'd always just whenever she was around me, anything she did with me I could feel the love radiating off of her like she was engulfed by it. you miss them whenever most topics come up or whenever you look or think about something, whenever I catch a bus whenever I go anywhere were she has been with me all I think about is her. the worst of it is when you still have to see them, I see her almost every day at school and it is always the biggest reminder of what I lost because everything I miss is right there walking by me, that the way I used to love her looking at me she can't even look at me anymore, that when she does see me it's this different person. but I'm no different deep down I never changed I'm still crazy about her, she's all I can ever think of she's all I want and I'd still do just about anything for her. we even miss the things we hated, like the anticipation waiting for her to arrive, or for her to reply back for her to finish work we miss the feelings we used to get, because now we are just waiting knowing they're never coming back