Accidentally on purpose

Chapter 1

Someone told me stay away from things that aren't yours, 

but was he yours if he wanted me so bad?

Natasha Romanoff wasn't one for dating and not that many people would be surprised by that. With her past, a personality that always seems to change depending on the circumstances and with her job, it isn't that very easy to date like a normal person. It would be an understatement to call her complicated. Relationships just wasn't her thing. Besides, she had no problem being on her own. She had been for most of her life and was used to it. Finding a guy to date wouldn't be that hard though. She could just take one step into a bar before most of the men started drooling over her which she nowadays found more tiring and disgusting than flattering. She could basically choose any man out of the crowd and they'd happily do whatever she felt like doing. And what she felt like doing was not dating because that was her problem. Keeping a guy around never worked out. It was either a one night stand or nothing at all. Natasha is not the type of woman to let someone in easily, which is extremely understandable. Who can you possibly trust with so many dark secrets? If you can't trust yourself to keep them quiet, don't expect anyone else to.

Steve Rogers on the other hand was one for dating and that's what he had been doing for quite a while now. He and Sharon Carter had been together for a few years. It was an alright relationship, Steve thought. He loved Sharon deeply. How could he not? She had most good qualities a guy could barely dream of. She was simply amazing. Their relationship, most often, was not. After being together for such a long time, what had been exciting and new slowly fades as it does in most relationships. It wasn't something Steve didn't expect to happen. He just felt like something was missing. Something felt empty. Not only did he have that feeling most of the time but they also fought about everything. Every little damn thing. It drove him crazy. Unfortunately, it wasn't one of those relationships were these fights ended in steamy kisses, but in annoying and tiring conversations before Sharon usually went to bed way too early. Steve knew that he was lucky to be with someone like Sharon, but sometimes, it just felt as if something was missing or that he was on the wrong track. These thoughts often confused him and he tried ignoring it, but it was hard as the feeling was not easy to ignore.

This night was as many other nights. Sharon and Steve managed to get into a fight over the smallest thing. It all started with Steve getting home late for dinner after work which of course had made Sharon a bit annoyed. Then as usual, they started arguing about that and it turned into worse and worse subjects. Both of them usually brought up things that didn't even have to do with the conversation which made them both more upset and this is how it continued. Sharon raised her voice at Steve as he just shook his head, looking down at his plate that was half stuffed with vegetables when he preferred to eat more of the carbs. He hummed annoyed at everything she said while he played with his food on the plate. Sharon got furious over the fact that he almost ignored the conversation, which he honestly did. After a good hour of fighting, Steve usually had enough and needed to clear his mind. He always went for a walk to wrap his head around their unnecessary fights and it didn't take long until he decided to get himself together and go back home to apologise. Tonight, however, he was tired of always having to be the one to admit his mistakes when he didn't think he had done much wrong at all. He was barely late home for dinner anyway. She was the one with the bad temper and tired mind. Steve grabbed his coat and slammed the door shut as he left their apartment.

It was really dark outside and the air was cold. It had the typical smell of winter even though winter wasn't even around the corner since it was in the middle of October. He wrapped his jacket a little tighter around his body and walked with heavy but quick steps forwards. He didn't know where to, but he just continued walking. In these cases, working out often helped. Especially running. He'd run for hours just to clear the thoughts from his mind, but he didn't feel like doing that on this late hour. After walking for a good while, he walked past a bar and decided that he could just as well sit down a bit and think. Since walking didn't help, maybe he just needed to relax. He got into the comfortably warm bar and sat down on the first free chair he saw before ordering a beer. Not that alcohol helped him at all since he couldn't get drunk, but at least he could pretend to be able to drink away his troubles.

"Rogers!" A very familiar voice suddenly said and Steve turned around a bit only to see Natasha, dressed in a tight black dress and high heels, give him a smirk. Steve raised his brows a bit surprised to see her there and smiled as she approached him. "What are you doing alone in a bar?" Natasha asked. Her voice was a little more chipper than usual so Steve assumed she had had a bit to drink. Still though, Natasha didn't get drunk easily so her mind was still clear enough to see that something was troubling her close friend. Steve looked around a bit as he thought of her question before facing Natasha again who sat down on the chair next to him. "You don't seem to have any company yourself." Steve answered and Natasha raised an eyebrow. "Well, they disappeared on me." She said and Steve nodded a bit before taking a sip of his beer. Natasha studied her friend as thoughts clearly flew around inside his mind like a thunderstorm. She and Steve had been really close friends for years and she trusted no one as much as she trusted him, except for Clint.

"Tell me, what's troubling you?" Natasha asked as the bartender put down a drink in front of Natasha which she clearly hadn't ordered. She took a sip without letting her eyes leave Steve's. "I've just had one of the usual fights with Sharon. They always seem to become more serious even though there's nothing serious we're fighting over, you know?" Steve said, frowning a bit as he thought of it. Natasha smiled. "Maybe she's mad because you haven't proposed yet?" She said and Steve chuckled lightly. "What's it been? Three years? I would be annoyed by you too." Natasha said, grinning a little as Steve just smiled. "I'm not even sure about the marriage thing." Steve said and Natasha looked at him a bit surprised. "Really? I always thought you'd jump into a marriage the first time you got the chance." Natasha said and Steve looked down at the bottle in his hands. "Yeah.. I just want it to feel right." Steve said, making Natasha frown. "Are you saying you aren't happy with Sharon? Because if that's the case, there's a line of women waiting to date you, Rogers." Natasha said, forcing out another smile on Steve's lips. "I'm happy with Sharon, I guess. I just thought that when you found the one, you'd be absolutely certain." He said and Natasha hummed a bit at that. "Mhm.. I don't think it's ever that easy." She said, before biting her lower lip a bit as she thought about it. Steve had to stop himself from staring at her lips so much, but she made it extremely hard for him stop just that. He sighed a bit, raising his eyebrows a little quickly. "I sometimes just wish it would be different." Steve said and Natasha dragged her hand through her red hair before glancing at him again. "Different how?" She asked softly, looking into his clear blue eyes. Steve almost got a bit dizzy by her intense eye contact and he found himself stumbling over his many thoughts. "I'm not sure.. Just different." He finally said and Natasha kept staring at him, before her eyes suddenly went down to his lips for a good while. Steve noticed and did what any man would have done if they had the chance. He simply cupped her cheek before giving her a soft kiss. Natasha was a bit surprised but kissed him back deeper, making Steve feel the taste of alcohol on her lips. Neither of them was sure of what they were doing, but it sure felt different.

Author's Note

Hey guys! This is a new story I will be posting here but also on Archive of Our Own. I will post most of my stories there in the future but I decided to share this one on here too cos I've really liked writing this one so far. 

I believe you can expect about 15 chapters, if I count it right and it may be some smut in it or a bit too detailed which is simply why I had to put an age limit on this story, unfortunately. 

Anyway, I really hope you'll like this story and how it continues. 

You can find me on:

Instagram: romanogersotp & endlessmarvel

Archive of our own: romanogersotp

Thank you for reading! :)

Ooh, btw, the quotes in the beginning of every chapter are from songs by Melanie Martinez. Check her out! I'm obsessed by her songs.