i. It's a warm night during the peak of summer. The room is enveloped by a friendly darkness, and the silence is only interrupted by the occasional noise of the air-conditioner. Their bodies are laying against each other, missing several layer of cloth over their skins.
Kazunari thinks that only a bottle of whiskey could make that moment even better.
Shintarou opens his mouth and everything breaks.
"Some time ago, I was invited to study abroad. I accepted the offer, so I'm moving to America next month."
Blue eyes widen in shock.
"Please break up with me."
Green eyes avert their gaze.
ii. "Why haven't you told me about it before?"
"I only made my decision a few days ago. I didn't told you right away because I was reflecting on our relationship."
"Yeah, there's also that!" Kazunari's voice raises drastically in tone. "Breaking up all of a sudden?! What's up with you?"
Once again, Shintarou looks away from his partner.
"To be honest..." His voice is wavering. "I don't think that either of us is mature enough to be in a long-distance relationship, especially one where we'll be an ocean apart from each other."
He wants to fight, to reassure his boyfriend, to tell that they can overcome it, but the words die in his throat.
Sometimes silence means agreement.
Kazunari knows that love alone isn't enough to carry on a relationship.
iii. "When are you leaving Japan?"
Piles of boxes are stacked on the living room. Kazunari drinks a cup of coffee while watching Shintarou sitting on the large couch, sighing. He thinks of selling it anyway, soon it'll be too large.
"In two weeks. I won't be at my parents' for too long, I'm not fond of the countryside. Also, I need to get used to things over there before classes start."
"I see." His reply is dry and distant. "You want a lift to the station?"
"I thought from the beginning that you would go with me."
"I will."
A horn echoes outside and Shintarou leaves the couch, picking up a box.
iv. It's been five years, four months and twenty-two days since Shintarou told him "I love you" for the first time.
It feels like it was yesterday. In the day they graduated from high school, the sun was starting to fall into horizon. All tears had already dried and all the necessary goodbyes had already been said. They held hands awkwardly for a few seconds, his best friend, no, boyfriend's face dyed in red.
Kazunari isn't drunk enough right now to think about that day.
v. It all felt so surreal, maybe because of how fast things happened.
Shintarou was surprised about how Kazunari managed to take it all in at once, to accept and deal with the whole situation.
Deep down, although a part of him didn't wanted this to happen, he was relieved that everything went smoothly, without his (ex-)boyfriend putting up a fight. He was a smart person, he knew that this outcome was a decision that was taken with the best for the both of them in mind.
But Shintarou still can't bring himself to face the pain in Kazunari's eyes.
Maybe because they reflected his own feelings too.
vi. "I'll be taking the last train." His glasses slips down his nose. "It's cheaper, so it's better."
vii. It's a cloudless night and the heat is intense. Kazunari rides the motorcycle, Shintarou holds tightly onto his waist, worrying over his backpack. It's his only luggage, since the rest had already been shipped to his parents, but some valuable things were inside. Not that his complains make the speed go down.
The train station is surprisingly crowded for such a late hour, but nothing compared to rush time. They find a nice place without a queue and go over the various options of hamburgers, although their minds are already somewhere else.
It's a quarter before midnight and Shintarou is afraid to lose his train.
The boarding plataform is miraculously empty.
Holding hands isn't awkward at all, rather, their fingers fit each other perfectly, like two halves of a complete being.
Once again, the world is silent.
viii. For a split second, Shintarou regrets.
ix. "Thank you for everything, Kazunari." His voice is warm as the summer night.
"I'm the one who should thank you." He snorts. "Good luck, honor student. Don't forget to keep in touch."
"Of course."
The train's departure bell is deafening.
Green and blue eyes reflect each other.
"I love you, Shin-chan. Please don't forget about me."
Time stops and their lips meet.
x. It's been a minute and forty-seven seconds since Shintarou told him "I love you" for the last time.
It feels like it was forever ago. The departure bell makes its annoying sound once more and the train starts moving, leaving the station without a prediction of coming back someday.
Kazunari can't see it anymore. His vision is blurry, his face is wet, his eyes are shut tight.
A clock rings midnight somewhere.
