New beggining 🏳

First flight

I am so scared , this is my first time taking the plane. I'm really nervous because of my anxiety. So basically I know that everything will be ok but I still want to throw up and cry like a baby.

I'm also just nervous because I leave all my friends and what I have left of family in Canada , that mean my dad , my sister and my grand-parents.

My mom had a car accident , my stepfather , my stepsister and my stepbrother were in the car with her. They didn't survived. That was in december , december 30th , I will always remember that date. The date I have lost my world.

This is my fault , I know it. They were in the car to pick me up at the dance studio , it was storming really badly and they were ice everywhere on the ground .They had lost the control of the car and crashed into an other car.

I had to finished my school year in quebec while I was living with my grand-mother. The youth protection department decided that my dad was not able to take care of us properly because he don't have a super paid work and that he live in a very little apartment. Like it was write somewhere that I had to go live with my mother's sister , I am now leaving for maryland to go live with her and her family. They only live there since 1 or 2 years so I know them well and they are really cool , but they moved because my cousin is in a really good baseball team that force them to leave Canada. My sister has to live with my dad's sister. She have the chance to stay in quebec and at the same school with her friends and boyfriend. I am gonna miss them so much.

One time each months ,  i'm will go back in Canada for 3 days to see my dad and my sister. Maybe my friends sometimes.

My best friend will come next week to help me with this big transition. She is 18 years old so she didn't had to convince her parents and she works super hard so her boss was okai to let her go. But my aunt and my oncle didn't want her to come the first week because they have planned activities for me and also because they want my room done before someone come.

Amelie ( my best friend) really help me with this and it will be so great to have her with me in maryland but I don't know what I am gonna do when she will leave back for quebec. Because of my anxiety I always plan things in advance and all that stuff so I know that I will have 3 weeks of summer break left before going back to school. I'm so nervous for school because in Canada I used to go in a French school and I have never been in an English school. Anyway I have to focus on the present time , that's what my psychologist told me.

Oh and by the way , my name is Mary and I am 16 years old.