"I swear, if I have to deal with my kids and their school problems again then you can forget about having a mom, just like you don't have a dad, and you can tell your sister that too."
How about,
I'm not going to fucking tell my sister that shit,
Maybe you don't mean it,
Maybe they were words heated up into conversation because you're stressed and frustrated,
And don't worry I understand,
But fuck, that's low,
Especially towards my sisters.
Fuck that hurts me.
I want to fuckin break down when I remember the conversations we have about being separated, that come up more than they should at all.
One of my biggest fears, is being without the both of you, let alone one of you is already hard enough.
I know you'd never leave.
I know you say that we're your life.
But at the same time,
If you're able to say those words and can't immediately say you take them back, that they don't mean anything.
Then who's to say, that possibly one day it isn't possible?
It's completely possible.
And that fuckin breaks my heart.
So I won't tell my sister.
I won't shed any useless tears.
And I won't bother asking about it or bringing it up at all.
But if one day, something happens at all that leaves me and my sisters alone, or separated, that will be the end.
And I will be filled with hatred.
I won't give up, but I'll fuckin break and mend myself and mould myself into someone else besides who I had been.
I'll seem the same, and no one will tell,
Fuck, I'll act as happy as we had been when those rare occasions of moving forward occurred, where our hopes were lifted and life almost seemed a little bit better.
How about I swear that deep down inside, I'll be boiling mad.
Yea, I'll have some long-termed parental issues.
I'll have some fucked up family issues.
But I'll keep those all inside and I won't let them fuck me over like the rest of our family has been.
I won't let them make me another copy of who I shouldn't be.
So don't even bother.
But don't worry either cause I still love you.
