A Piece of My Heart

Note : I don’t really care about the rhyming in a poem, because truthfully I’m not good at it. Whenever I write a poem, it’s just to pour out my heart. I hope you understand what I want to scream to the world in this poem.

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A Piece of My Heart

I remember the way you used to clap your hands happily

I remember the way you used to follow me everywhere

I remember the way you used to say your first word

Pa . . . pa . . . pa . . .

You are not my own child

But I love you nonetheless

My nephew

But, soon everything changed

I remember the way you stopped clapping

I remember the way you stopped recognizing me

I remember the way you stopped talking

Only silence . . .

You are not my own child

But you made me worry nonetheless

My nephew

They diagnosed Autism

The disease that we’ve never heard before

The disease that crushed our little world

The disease that I wish I never knew

Bringing pain . . .

You are not my own child

But I felt the pain nonetheless

My nephew

They suggested therapy

The therapy that made you start to recognize the world once again

The therapy that made you looking at me in the eyes again

The therapy that made you start to talk once again

Bringing happiness . . .

You are not my own child

But I felt happy for you

My nephew

They suggested normal school

You are still different from the other kids

You are still living in your own world

You are who you are

Struggling hard . . .

You are not my own child

But I know you are struggling

My nephew

He said you are crazy

But what I’ve heard today hurt me

Your classmate told me what one of the seniors said

You don’t know how much it pained me

Slicing my heart . . .

You are not my own child

But I cried for you

My nephew

My wishes for you

I wish you can fight for yourself in this cruel world

I wish you can stand up above those who ridiculed you

I wish you can make me proud

Looking at the future . . .

You are not my own child

But I pray for your future

My nephew

This is just a piece of my heart for you, Jonathan

From your dearest auntie . . .

***

Note : I know there must be a lot of flaws in this poem, but I didn’t want to change a thing. I want you to feel, what I really felt and wanted to say when I wrote this poem. The pain is fresh, struggling to come out. I cried, while I wrote this. A little child’s words, but it sliced my heart!

If I changed a thing, it wouldn’t make the same message or the same feeling. I hope you understand. Thank you.