Broken (BoyxBoy)

One

“Oh come on, I was just horny. You can't actually believe I meant that shit.” He chuckled. “Besides, you weren't even that good anyways.”

I… I hate him.

My fists were clenched tightly and I could barely stop myself from bursting into tears. “I… I thought…” My voice cracked.

He simply rolled his eyes. “Dude, did you actually think I could fall in love with you?” He snorted, “Try thinking for once.”

He… he stole my…

“That… that was my…” My voice trailed off, unable to bring myself to say it.

“First time? Yeah, I could tell. You were tight as fuck, but you could barely give me head without your teeth getting in the way.”

My fists clenched tighter and I shut my eyes, desperately holding back the tears. “B-but...”

He lied about everything…

“Look, I gotta go. Gimme a call when you've fucked more.”

And with that, he left.

The door slammed shut behind me, the cold winter air using it's one last chance to nip at my bare hands. “Hey honey, did you have fun with your friends?” My mum’s voice echoed throughout the house.

I used all of my willpower to keep my voice steady as I responded, “Yeah… I'm going to be up in my room for a while.”

I already felt the tears start falling as I ran up the stairs. “Okay, dinner will be ready in abo-” I cut her off by slamming the door.
“God damn it…” I threw myself onto my small bed, the wood creaking under the sudden strain.

“How could I be so fucking stupid?!” I screamed into my pillow, the slightly rough material already soaking in my salty tears.

Why would I think anybody would ever fucking love me? I'm the fucking weird kid who only writes in his fucking dumbass book! What the fuck is wrong with me?!

I hate everything.
He… he seemed so nice. He actually talked to me, unlike anyone else. And… and last night… when he finished… he…

“I love you”

His hollow words echoed throughout my head, making it's way down to my chest and piercing my heart.

“Just stop… stop stop stop stop STOP!” The pillow absorbed my meaningless cries.
The image of him laughing when I talked to him about it earlier…

It made my heart shatter.

Fifteen minutes later, a knock was heard at my door. “Dinners ready!” I waited for the footsteps to fade away before slowly lifting myself up, forcing the tears to stop. I can't let her think anything is wrong.

After a few deep breaths to steady my breathing, I headed out. I felt tears start to come back and I had to stop to calm myself down again.

“Are you ready for school tomorrow?” My mother looked at me over the pot of soup in the center of the oak table. I nodded silently, my eyes widening slowly as I realized that I'd have to see him again tomorrow. My body stiffened up, my rear hurting as the memories of last night flashed through my head. “I'm full, thanks.” my voice cracked as I finished talking.

I quickly stood up and went upstairs. “Alright… I'll put the rest in the fridge if you get hungry later…”
I shut the door and leaned against it as I gasped for air. I took a step towards my bed before my legs gave out under me and I burst into tears