Forgive Me?

'Dear Niall,

When I laid there beside you,                                                                                                                     Could you feel me there?                                                                                                                                  My arms were wrapped around you,                                                                                                            And I was stroking your hair.

I was talking about all the good times,

For me they were every single day.

I wanted you to feel love and comfort,

And happy in some way.

I watched your every breath,

And prayed that each one wasn't your last.

The time we got to share together,

Went by too quick...Too fast.

I wanted you to wake up,

Please Ni...Open your eyes.

Tell me this is a nightmare,

And not our goodbyes.

As your last breath grew closer,

We lay there peacefully together.

My heart continually breaking,

Because I wanted you forever.

Then there it was,

Your final breath of air.

I didn't want to believe it,

This is so cruel and not fair.

I held your beautiful face,

And prayed you'd breath again.

I wasn't ready for you to go,

I couldn't admit that this was the end.

But then I realized that you were now in peace,

And not suffering anymore.

You were beginning the life of an Angel,

And your body would no longer be sore.

I held you close and squeezed you tight,

And tried to say goodbye.

I've lost my Ni and my number one best friend,

All my heart could do is cry.

I slowly got up,

I wanted so much to stay.

I leaned over and gave you one more kiss,

It was so hard to walk away.

Niall you are my entire world,

And I miss you so very much.

I wish I could feel your loveable cuddle,

And your soft and gentle touch.

But for now I have to wait,

Until we meet again.