Ticket Outta Loserville (Trames au)

Chapter 13- Tristan's POV

James McVey is pretty much at the bottom of the list of people I want to see right now, yet here he is. He humiliated me earlier, and now we've swapped places- he cried this morning when he came out to me, but now I'm the one who's crying on the floor. It's been a weird morning, and it all escalated so quickly. "Hey." he says quietly.

I just bury my head further into my knees. "Go away James."

I feel him put a hand on my shoulder. "No." he says firmly. "You didn't let me cry alone. I know you don't want to see me, but you'll feel worse if I leave you here." 

I sniffle, a tear rolling down my cheek. "You're right, I don't want to talk to you."

I hear James sigh as he sits down beside me. "I know. I don't blame you." I don't reply, and we sit in silence for a while, but soon I'm fighting the urge to cry again. "It's ok to cry, I won't judge." James says. He wraps his arms around me tightly. "Come here. You won't accept my apology, but please let me hug you."

Eventually, I give in and lean into his hold. I'm so upset that I barely register how weird this is. He's warm, and despite how angry and sad I am, for some weird reason I feel safe. And that's when I let the tears out. They come streaming down my cheeks, and I'm embarrassingly aware that James' shirt is getting wet. I don't know how long I cry for- I just can't stop all my sadness pouring out. James just continues to hold me, and I find myself clinging to him as he whispers to me comfortingly.

When I've calmed down, I manage to say "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologise." James says firmly. "I'm in the wrong, not you. Please don't feel bad."

I smile weakly. "I guess it's payback for earlier."

"Indeed." says James, smiling. "But your shirt's still wet. You can't go around like that. I'm going to change into my PE shirt." 

I wipe a stray tear off my cheek. "That's a good idea. But I don't have PE today, so I don't have my stuff."

James bites his lip. "Oh yeah, I forgot you aren't on the team." I laugh weakly- James has seen me in PE, he should know that there's no chance of me being on a sports team. The small bit of light relief has cheered me up a bit, and I'm feeling better now that I've been comforted. I don't think I'll fully acknowledge it all until later- it's been such a weird day. 

James is clearly still trying to solve the problem. "Wait." he says. "We're about the same height. You can wear my team jersey."

"What?" I say, looking shocked.

"Why not?" James asks. "It's that or go around with a wet shirt." I can sort of see his point- he's changing out of the shirt that I cried through, why shouldn't I do the same? But the thought of wearing the clothes of a guy that but claim to hate and who made me cry earlier is too strange to think about. 

Despite this, I find myself saying "Ok." We stand up and James pulls me into a hug.

"I really am sorry." he says. "I was awful to you."

I sigh. "It's ok. I've had worse."

"You shouldn't have had to." he replies. "I'm sorry." We let go of each other, and my brain is screaming 'no, don't let go!' All my thoughts about this weird morning are swimming around in my head as we go to get James' stuff from the lockers. The changing rooms are in use, so we have to use the bathroom. I'm just glad that no one can see what's going on because that would just be too hard to explain. 

I'm hoping that if I keep my jacket on, no one will know it's James' shirt even though it helpfully has his surname in giant letters on the back. As I slip it on, I realise that it smells like him, and in a weird way that's nice- it reminds me of the comforting hug he gave me earlier. Don't get me wrong, I'm still upset at him, but I feel better now. As I walk out, James says "I'm sorry about this, but it'll have to do."

"It's ok." I say. "Thank you."

James sighs. "You shouldn't have to thank me. I was horrible." 

Thankfully, the bell rings before I can answer, and we head off to English. It's been such a weird day- that fight, James crying and coming out to me, him humiliating me, me crying and now this. All in the space of about an hour and a half. Eventually, I decide to ignore him as much as possible in English as I don't want people asking me weird questions. All that I can do is hope that no one spots my shirt, even though in a weird way I'd like them to. I guess I'm just not thinking straight.

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Well, that was terrible 😂  Let me know if you enjoyed it though! Also sorry for lack of update last week, I was so tired!

I know what I said last time but I still can't believe trump is president 😭 I'm not even American and I'm still convinced we're doomed.