Life has lost

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I think maybe I'm a little crazy

a little caught up in popularity

maybe to turn it around I pay for the green

yeah man that'll make this constant depression run away

love is our weapon and I feel a little less crazy when i'm smoking a blunt

some new music a little something more

will the crank help?

please tell me it will

cause i just used my college money on some meth and coke

baby i'm fine

I've lost a few pounds only cause you can't eat when you're sleeping

I think my depression has gotten worse

I look tired as anything

And love failed me

my boy is looking at naked ladies on the computer screen

So I'll stand at the mirror for hours at a time

Wondering why I can't be those ladies he watches

So I'll sit and I'll cry staring at every bruise and cut on my body

And every little penny sized ammount of fat on my body

And I'll realize this is why he watches them instead of me

So screw me and my blind optimism 

Because the thing I loved the most failed me

So I'll sit at the table staring down at the food I never asked for

And he'll be so tired of watching them that he sits beside me

He runs his fingers through my hair

I'll cringe in depise knowing his lies

And then I'll cry as I fall to the ground

The feeling of me being so weak makes him crave me

Just what I thought I always wanted

I'm on the ground and he crawls on top of me

And I'll scream and fight with all my weak might

I'm so weak

I haven't eaten in a while

And then he enters me

That's when everything goes black

And now I'm back bloody and bruised

And I'm ready to smoke anything

I just want to escape reality

He violated my rights

I do have rights! 

Just because I'm so skinny and I'm so fragile and I've done not so good things

That doesn't mean I've been stripped of my rights

So kill me my sweet suicide

Because I'm so over living this life

I've been raped of my rights

I'm so done with coke

I'm so done with the green and some shrooms with that

But to die is so great to me

How can I heal from this life that has killed my rights!

I think no one realized that my eating disorder overtook me

I think no one realized that I was raped

I think no one realized that the nicotine doesn't help

Nothing can save me now

Nobody cared before

So why should they now?

So I'll pull the trigger and I'll jump off that bridge

No one can save me now

Nothing can save me now

You've reached the end of published parts.

⏰ Last updated: Feb 04, 2012 ⏰

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