Missed Connections

Chapter 41 - All of Me

Most of the morning had flown by and I needed to get ready for work. As I hop in the shower, I leave my phone near the sink with the volume maxed just in case I get a text back from Louis. I really want to hear from him, but I also want to be more chill about things. As the water washes over me, I close my eyes, seeking some inner zen. A few deep breaths later, I vow to put my phone on silent and go about my day. Periodic checks only, like a sane person.

After I've dry off and grab what I need from the bathroom, I head back to my room. In the process, I check my phone one last time. No text from Louis...yet. Atta girl, Ev. Thinking positively already! I pop the phone into my purse by the door. Another deep breath gives me the strength I need to leave it behind.

I get ready in record time. It's a warm day, so I put on a cute pair of cut-off shorts and throw on one of my favourite slouchy tanks. Deadpool, with the tag line 'I don't feel like adulting today.' Sassy but cute, and popular to boot. Thanks, Ryan Reynolds. I let my hair fall naturally, stick straight, figuring there isn't much point in doing curls if I am just going to sweat out all that effort. And I may end up even pulling back at work. One cannot work miracles in humid weather.

Luckily some of the puffiness from my nocturnal sniveling has dried up, but I can still see a few faint traces. I decide to work a strategic eyeliner wings and add a splash of red lipstick. Or at least to distract from any hot mess that is left periorbitally. After one less check to make sure that neither my bra or ass is showing too much, I head out.

I toss in my earbuds as I walk to the subway. Today's playlist is a fine collection of pop hits and upbeat music to rev up my energy. Gotta put a pep in my step. Though, chatting to the girls has probably been the best remedy for my neuroses. Sharing your burdens and frustrations with those you love and trust is the crux of healthy living. If I hadn't had the girls after Wes died, I wouldn't have survived. They have saved the day once again.

And now I just need to work on rebuilding that same trust with Louis. I really was being too hard on him. My expectations weren't clear, even to me, and that just doesn't work in a reciprocal relationship. The space between unvoiced expectations and what actually happens is a breeding ground for resentment. I hope I didn't let it get that far.

I'm so engrossed in my reflections, I barely notice the commute to work. As soon as I step out of the subway car, I'm met with oppressive heat and humidity. Praying that the air conditioning is working at the café, I trudge along Queen West dodging other sweaty bodies. As I open the door to Beans and Cornbread, I am met with a refreshing breeze of filtered, cool air. I sigh deeply as the beads of sweat on my skin cool and small goose bumps arise. Glorious.

"Hidy-Ho, Evynn!" says a familiar and friendly voice.

"Steve!" I exclaim, beaming from ear to ear. It feels likes ages since I've actually worked with Steve and Claire, the owners. When they aren't slinging coffee in the summer, they are usually spending time at their cottage or preparing it as a short-term rental for vacationers. Lots of work, but worth it if you can help off-set the costs or make a little bit of easy money. And you can't go wrong with a place on the famous Muskoka Lake; it's prime cottaging country.

"Evynn!" pipes in another beautiful voice. "Enjoying the weather?"

"Is it that obvious that I'm melting, Claire? I feel worse than Olaf without his cloud."

"You look lovely as usual, hunny. We're all feeling the weather today. Feels strange not being able to jump in the lake to cool off."

"We've always got the walk-in fridge," I retort with a smile.

"There is that," add Steve. "Though, I'm not sure we want eau-du-B.O. mixing in with the cream."

"Ew, too far," I reply. "Images of curdled dairy products are in my head now. My gag reflex can't take it!"  I put on my best vomit miming act with as much zeal as a vaudeville artist with new tap shoes.  I glance over and see Steve giggling away.