OCTale: Pacifist [Editing]

9) True Feelings [Edited]

As me and Castellar travel deeper into the caverns, I try to strike up some conversation with her as we stroll through the dampening cave.

 "So, Castellar, do you...like Impact? You seem to get mad at him pretty often..." I giggle, Castellar staying quiet as she thinks of an answer.

 " Hmm...it's a bit difficult to say. I love him, of course. He's my older brother, how couldn't I? I used to look up to him a lot...he was one of the reasons I joined the Guard, I wanted to be just like him!" She explains, as I listen intently.

"But then a few years ago, something...happened. And Impact's never been the same. " Castellar admits, and I raise an eyebrow.

 "And yelling at him helps how?" I ask, Castellar frowning as she understands my point.

 "I know that something's going on in his head, but that doesn't mean he has to bring that to work! He needs to keep his own issues to himself when we're on duty, not just half-ass everything! And I've tried to be nicer about it in private with him, but he never wants to talk about it!" She rants, but takes a deep sigh before continuing.

"It's just really irritating that he won't even talk to his own sister about his problems..." She whines, as she looks down at the floor and starts to fidget with her hands.

 "That kinda sucks...hearing about how you and Impact have drifted apart. What...what happened, all those years ago? Do you know?" I ask, trying to not strike a nerve with her. She looks back up at me, her joyous smile faltering.

"As I said...he barely talks to me about it. All I know is that there was...this bad person, doing bad things that nobody can remember anymore - besides Impact. I know because he talks in his sleep about it...when he has these terrible nightmares where he lashes out, he even fired attacks in his sleep once! It cost so much to fix that hole in the wall...Anyway, there's no use bothering him about it if he doesn't want to talk." She sighs again, looking back down at the floor as she's lost in thought.

 " Huh...but yeah, you're right. He probably just needs some time. " I reassure, before we stop as we reach a clearing.

Castellar pauses, as she sees Impact at another one of his posts. She opens her mouth to say sonething, but then looks back at me as she hesitates. I give her a comforting smile.

 "...You're right. I should probably be nicer to him in general." She sighs, before walking up to his post, and slamming her hands down on the table. Impact is unfased by the manoeuvre, as Castellar hangs her head down and mumbles something.

 "Hey Impact. What are you doing, nothing?" I hear her chuckle, as Impact raises an eyebrow at her change in attitude.

 " Hey Castellar...? Are you okay? You're...not yelling at me like normal." He consoles, confused and concerned over the change.

And as Castellar raises her head, I see tears start to stream down her face.

"This...this shouldn't be normal, Impact! I've been having a go at you so much recently, I forgot to account for how you feel about it! I must have made you feel horrible these past few weeks! I'm so sorry!" She sobs, as Impact immediately starts gesturing for her to calm down.

 "Woah, hey, Castellar! This isn't your fault!" He remarks, running around from his post to put an arm around her in comfort.

 "...it's my fault. You're right to be angry at me. You're always right." Impact mumbles sadly, and I see him...frown. I see him frown for the very first time.

"No! Stop it! Let me blame myself for once!" Castellar demands, shaking her brother's hand off of her.

"I know you've been having nightmares about that horrible thing that happened a few years ago, and I did nothing to help you! I was more concerned about the money to fix the wall then you, when you used an attack on your sleep! No wonder...no wonder you think I don't care about you!" She trembles, falling to her knees as she's overwhelmed by her revelation.