The Loon

Hey Looney Tunes!

Heather

I was eating my lunch near the tree away from the school building itself. Away from the harsh reality and away from the grasp of my fellow 'Normal' human and so I find comfort on the old and abandoned acacia tree whom we shared a deeper connection and feeling so well.

While looking at my food, past memories flash before my very eyes reminiscing the painful and downfalls moments I've been through. Far from my mind there is a voice who keeps on telling me 'crazy', 'psycho', 'mad', 'wacko', 'weirdo', 'idiot' and 'bird brain'. I suddenly cover my ears to stop from hearing those words. I never acknowledge that my tears already flowing one by one and this just prove how miserable I was in my whole life time. 

Schizophrenia

''Your son has been experiencing symptoms which is very much a like to the symptoms of 'Schizophrenia' and it may last a very long span of time" my psychiatrist said while tangling here fingers all together with a sorry looks behind her squared shape glasses who slid on the bridge on her nose but she pushed it back.

"Well, is there a--a you know treatment o-or something? to you know-lessen his psychotic behavior" my mother plead. 'My mom disgust me for what I have and what I am' that's what my second voice said to which it sadden me.

"There is indeed some medications for Schizophrenia but they differ from benefits, risks and cost though I presume you don't seem to mind on the large amount of money it may cost. But here are some of the medications like Typical antipsychotics have equal drop-out and symptom relapse rates to atypicals when used at low to moderate dosages. There is a good response in 40–50%, a partial response in 30–40%, and treatment resistance (failure of symptoms to respond satisfactorily after six weeks to two or three different antipsychotics) in 20% of people. Clozapine is an effective treatment for those who respond poorly to other drugs ("treatment-resistant" or "refractory" schizophrenia), but it has the potentially serious side effect of (lowered count) in less than 4% of people. So for me I highly prescribed atypicals antipsychotic which it has a mild side effect but if the symptoms really do persist then I prescribed the Clozapine but it has  the potentially serious side effect than atypical antipsychotics. If you're son is  unwilling or unable to take medication regularly, long-acting preparations of antipsychotics may be used to achieve control. 

"We'll take it, the atypicals antipsychotic medication"

the memory dims and cut just like a movie, it went to the next scene that has new background, different situation, and new faces of the people but the same conflict all over again that I faced, the next memory.

It shines like a star and blinding me then there appear me, sitting on the corner sulking and having hallucinations. That day I forgot to take my meds because I-I thought that I was getting better and then next thing I knew came a voices inside my head. 

I heard the front door open of the house which I presumed is my dad come home for what? to yelled profanities at me and telling me that he regret on having a mental disorder son like me whom won't become the heir of the company and inherit all his funds he was getting after working hard but from when was the last time I've ever seen his face? a months later from wherever he was. When they knew about my disorder that, I thought they would change for me at least, that finally I could feel their presence not just their constant presents, also love, care, and guidance from my parents but my hopes on satisfying my yearning for parental figures seem ebbing away.

I  stand up from my sitting position and went out of my room to finally greet him after days of not seeing him. Just as I was about to descend from the grand stairs, I mid stop my pace.  He was greeted by my fuming mother by the door way with fist hands on her petite hips.