It was afternoon. Monica was staring blankly at her tea and stirring the bag, absent-mindedly imagining scenarios of her and Chandler. From a smile, changing to a frown due to reality finally hitting her. She remembered what had happened the other day when she was actually on the brink and got the courage of telling him the truth.
Flashback
Monica's POV
I took a deep breath. And knocked. Okay. All or nothing. I'm doing this.
He was there right infront of me.
Me: "I have to tell you something. I- i-" he knew that I was hesitating about what i'm going to say.
"I... i.." He raised his eyebrow waiting for me to finish the sentence though I couldn't get it out of my mouth!
"Nevermind forget about it" I cringed and was planning to turn back.
Chandler:"No mon, what is it?"
Me:"It's nothing really."
Chandler:"Then tell me."
Me:"Nothing really. See? I just told you."
Chandler: "Seriously."
Me:"I don't want to."
Chandler:"Come ooon! What is it? tell me!"
Me:"I can't it'll just make things complicated."
Chandler: "Oh wow. That doesn't make me wanna know even more. You know, you've been acting so strange and quiet lately. You have feelings for me don't you?
Ha! Just kidding."
what if i told you i did? =.=
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Present
She sighed, took a sip of her tea and got back to imagining, had her elbow on the arm of the couch and her head rested on her palm. Her eyes we're looking from afar this time not focused at anything and it seemed like it was all a blur.
Without noticing, Chandler had walked in and saw her. He snapped infront of her.
Chandler: "Hey you thinking of something?"
Monica: "No. I'm just really sleepy."
Chandler: "You sure? Don't got a problem?" he asked, getting concerned.
She shaked her head and faked a smile.
Monica*standing up*: So, why are you here? What do you need?"
Chandler: "Can opener. Ours broke. You got one?"
Monica: "Yeah." she walked to the kitchen and handed him the opener.
Chandler: "Thanks. And hey, if you want you can go over to my place and have a drink while Barbara's still out." he suggested.
Monica: "Naaah. I'm gonna go shopping with Rach later.."
Chandler: "Oh. Maybe some other time then."
Monica: "Of course." he smiled and went back to his apartment.
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3 days has passed and the thought of telling him how she really feel is really bothering her. She's so torn between just letting it go or making a move. It's like Phoebe's voice haunting her at night telling her that she should do it before it's too late. She also knows that even if he rejects her at least she won't spend the rest of her life wondering what would've happenedif she confessed to Chandler but it was just so weird now. To fall inlove with this guy who just sees you as a friend and you know you lost your chance but he too, wanted something once.
These thoughts came into her mind while laying down her bed, scrolling through the messages on her phone and opening her facebook and twitter. When she got tired, she remembered about her leather notebook where she keeps all her thoughts.
That was such a bad idea. I better go find it. I bet it's just around the guys apartment........OH DEAR GOD! IT'S IN THE GUY'S APARTMENT! WHAT IF CHANDLER READS IT?! NOOOOO.
She stood right up and ran out in the hallway straight to Joey and Chandler's apartment.
She went inside and nobody was there. The lights were closed too. She rummaged through the kitchen drawers and got a little panicked knowing that Chandler might have read it.
Chandler showed up again. What a bad timing.
Chandler: "Hey Mon." she felt her heart pound. All of a sudden she was nervous. She felt tension. Why did she feel this way?
"Are you...looking for something?" he went closer to her.
"Ah yeah! It's uhm..A- a lock- a I mean a leather notebook with a lock and uhm i figured that uhm Rachel may have hid it heere?"
"Why are you stuttering?"
"I-I don't know! I- I dunno! Caffeine maybe? You know, i really don't!" *nervous smile*
Chandler: *smirks*
This gesture kinda relaxed her. Knowing him, he might've made up a couple of jokes in his head or making fun of her.
Monica:"What's so funny?" she crossed her arms.
Chandler:" I'm not laughing" he shrugged.
Monica:"You know what, maybe i'll just find it some other time."
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Chandler: "I've read it."
Monica: "WHAT."
Chandler: "Is this what you're looking for?" he took the notebook on top of the shelf and showed it to her. The lock was opened.
Monica ran her fingers through her hair in disbelief. It was stressing her out.
Monica: "Oh my god. No. Nooo.*wimps* No no no no no." her eyebrows furrow. She hugged him. "Im so so so sorry!"
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