If only she knew

If only she knew chpt 1

"Cassandra!!" Yelled my mum from downstairs "come on get up already you have school in 20 minutes so I suggest you start moving now!"

I got up and chose a pair of blue nikes,black jeans and a blue Nike top.

I groaned as I made my way to the bathroom mumbling why didn't my stupid alarm work then I realised what happened last night.......

-------------------Flashback-(3 years ago, 13 years old)-------------------

"Hahahahaha look at how ugly she looks omg dude we should totally trip her" said zayn laughing his head off while his mates joined in.

"Hahahaha omg here she comes hey guys the nerd is here" shouted one of his friends that I couldn't quite see because I tripped on something which happened to be zayns foot.

"Owwwwwwwwwwww you tripped me on purpose" I said while lying down on the floor, holding my ankle in pain because my ankle twisted and i started to yell out while crying "Someone please help me!!"

But obviously no one did because they were either 1) to busy laughing 2) to scared to stick up or 3) was in on it.

I went to my first lesson with my foot limping while trying to walk into the classroom for 1st period but fell on my but because someone rudely slammed the door in my face and left off laughing.

The teacher came to me, helped me up and told me to go to the nurses office because I couldn't participate throughout the whole lesson. so i managed to walk with my twisted ankle, limping and when i got a pass to go home I called my mum to come and pick me up.

She started to get worried because I would always come home with either an arm, leg, toe,foot and many more body parts that were getting hurt and the problem was that I didn't do anything about it, I just let it happen to me.

Until one day.............

I came back from school with a bruise on my stomach and I just couldn't take it anymore I went to the bathroom grabbed out a razor and started doing something I couldn't believe I was doing.

I was cutting.

I was cutting my skin.

I was cutting myself and it felt good that I got pain In return and I kept on cutting until I was satisfied and realised my arms were covered in scars and the sink was full of blood. I cried a lot that night because I was cutting and it started growing on me so I started to do it more often.

I cried ever night after he bullied me.

So pretty much a whole year.

I was cutting myself one night and then my mum walks in on me, looks at me and starts crying.

"Why are you cutting yourself?" My mum asked still sobbing and stuttering a bit.

"I....I.i.i....." I stuttered because I couldn't let her know.

"Tell me now!" She said which came out like a half demanding, half sobbing kinda way.

" we'll you know zayns mum" I said while she nodded ( my mum and zayns mum were really cose friends, you could even say best friends)

"he......he.his been b-bullying me" I said while my mum got a shocked look on her face and shouted "I'm calling his mum right now!!" As she got up and out of the bathroom.

But before she made her way out to phone zayns mum she said and I quote "promise me you'll never cut again, okay?" She said in a soothing, calm kinda way while rubbing my back.

"I promise mum" i said.

"We'll okay then sweetie I love you Cassandra" my mum said with me saying back "I love you to mum.

----------------------End of flashback---------------------------

The thing that is still on my mind is why he left in the first place and why?

Omg no he can't be back no no no no no no no I said in my mind while looking in the cupboard and notice that the razor was still there.

so I grabbed it and started cutting again just before he can bully me so I have already felt pain.

I looked in the mirror and cleared all the tears away then I quickly went back to my room to change into a loose Nike hoodie to hide the evidence.

As I made my way downstairs I grabbed a granola bar and before I made my way out of the door my mum shouted out "please don't let zayn get to you he has changed for the better so could you please be nice"

I almost laughed at this while exiting the front door and making my way to my beat up old truck.

Don't judge our family didn't really have a lot of money but I was still over the moon that I got a car.

I drove into school and notice that there was this black sports car that I have never seen before parked in the schools parking lot.

I then saw this guy come out of his car and..........

hot dayummmmm!!!! I said In my mind as i saw that he had 6 abs (maybe 8), perfect jawline, beauitful sparkling green eyes, his hair gelled up with loose strands of hair (or maybe its naturally like that not sure) and sure did he grab the attention of the whole school.

he had a dangerously looking smirk on his face that made me melt.

here i was still trying to figure out who he was then froze in my spot as I saw him approach me .

He came to me and whispered in my ear from behind "hello there, long time no see" and there I was frozen in my spot.

Then turned around and instantly gasping out the words that were dry in my throat but I brought the courage to say......

"zayn?"

"Yes babe, I'm back" said zayn with a smirk on his lips.

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What did you guys think??

This is my first book I'm writing and I'm planning on completing this book.

Please don't judge me :)

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