How to Disappear Completely | Joshler

Chapter Two | Make Believe Monsters

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Constantly torn between wanting to be alone and wanting to feel loved, Tyler was left frustrated. On some nights, the company of the stars was enough to satisfy him. However, tonight he felt overwhelmingly lonely. All he wanted was someone to hold. He didn't mind who it was.

Without warning, the thoughts came back, more aggressive than ever. Tyler began thinking about the bridge and the water and his family and for some reason, that was all he could think about. No matter how much he shook his head, the thoughts kept swarming in his mind.

Tyler, in defeat, decided to go for a small walk. It was cold and it was dark. The only light that was available were a few streetlights. Tyler looked down at his feet as he walked. The dim lights illuminated the pavement and gave it a warm tint. As he walked further, he came across a dark shadow standing just in front of his feet. As his eyes followed the shadow, he came across a mysterious figure.

Something about the thing drew Tyler in closer. Maybe it was how unnaturally tall the form looked or how terrifyingly still it stood. He wasn't sure what it was exactly. The longer he stared, the more scared he got. He began to question if it was even human. Had his monsters finally come to life?

Tyler's fear felt like stones on his back, weighing him, slowing him down. However, somehow his curiosity was just strong enough to fuel him to keep going. As he walked closer he notices how much shorter the figure actually was compared to how it appeared a few steps ago. Finally, he sees him.

"Josh?"

"Tyler! I've been looking for you for buddy."

"You have? H- how'd you know I'd be here?"

"You texted me? Like fifteen minutes ago." Josh chuckled lightly.

"Oh..." Guilt bubbled in Tyler's stomach. "I'm sorry Josh, I forgot again."

"It's okay Ty." Josh reassured as he softly nudged his friend's arm.

Nowadays, Tyler would blank out and do things unconsciously. Whenever he finally regained consciousness, he never remembered what he had done. He had concluded that it was because of the new medication he'd been taking, along with all the stress and the sleepless nights he had been enduring.

He wouldn't dare tell anyone about it, they'd all think he's weird. Anyway, whom else would he tell? His mother would probably develop insomnia worrying about him and his father would get too invasive and. Josh was the only one who knew about Tyler's problem. The only reason why Tyler told Josh was that he accidentally left the sink running when he slept over and felt guilty when a huge puddle formed on the kitchen floor.

"Hey, are you okay?" Josh asked with concern.

He looked at Tyler, examining him. Although he had seen his best friend just this morning, Tyler looked different from how he looked a few hours ago. Messy hair, scruffy chin, baggy eyes. Everything about him read lost. "Yeah... I think so." Tyler quietly responded.

"Oh, okay. You just looked really lost, that's all."

"Oh, haha," Tyler nervously laughed. "No, I'm just really tired." he lied.

'What was he thinking?' Josh thought. "Well then, we should go now. It's getting pretty late," he said, stepping backwards.

Tyler didn't budge which confused Josh. He held out his hand for Tyler to take. He knew that his friend was scared because he himself would act like this whenever he was anxious. After a few moments, Tyler hesitantly held Josh's hand and started walking.

As a car passed, they heard a loud, muffled beat and heard the ever so familiar lyrics, 'started from the bottom...' Tyler, who was suddenly annoyed, rolled his eyes and groaned. Drake. Josh laughed. Without looking, he can tell that his friend was rolling his eyes.

After a few awkward silences, they reached Josh's car.

Tyler tried opening his door but it wouldn't budge. "Sorry, it's sorta broken." Josh laughed as he got in the car and opened the door from the inside.

Tyler thanked him and sat down, his body tense. Both tried their best not to make any eye contact. Josh started to question his decisions. 'Maybe I shouldn't have held Tyler's hand. Now everything's gotten awkward.' he thought. Josh turns to look at Tyler. "So Ty, how was the shoot?" he asked, hoping to get rid of the awkwardness.

"Josh, can I crash at your place tonight?" Tyler suddenly asked, completely ignoring his friend's question.

"Um... Yeah, sure bud. That's fine with me." Josh answered.

He was confused but he didn't want to question Tyler.

"Thanks. I owe you."

Tyler sighed, feeling relieved as he slouches on his seat, his head digging into the leather.

Josh turned to face Tyler. He had on his usual contemplative look. "Hey are you okay?" Josh asked once again.

"Yeah." This time Tyler looked at him, smiling.

"Okay." Josh smiled also.

Tyler reached over to turn on the radio, his suddenness startling Josh. Although Tyler hated feeling as if he was disappearing, he decided it was better for him to slip into the sound. So he did.