Narnia: Children of the Sun (On Hold)

Forgive and Forget

I came back from my scouting mission and I was met with panic and chaos. Susan and Lucy were running after Edmund down one of the tunnels yelling something about Peter and Caspian. I ran down the tunnel after them and with every step it was getting colder and colder.

When I got to the cavern, Peter and Caspian were having a testosterone struggle in front of a big, icy wall as Edmund went after a wolf on the other side of the room. It was all really very confusing. I didn't know what was going on as Susan stood in horror. Lucy was about to be killed by Nikabrik until Trumpkin stabbed him in the back with his sword.

Then the icy wall began to speak to Peter. Caspian was pushed to the ground by Peter at that point and he looked up at it and began leaning towards it. Just as I was about to ask what was going on, the icy wall exploded and right behind it was Edmund with his sword over his head and his face turned away so the ice wouldn't hit him.

He looked at Peter and said sarcastically, "Yea, I know, you had it sorted." 

He sheathed his sword and started to walk away. He didn't look at me as he passed. Susan and Lucy were looking at Peter like he had done something wrong, whereas Peter looked completely dazed and confused. I was too far away to hear what they had said.

We had to burn three bodies that day. Turns out Nikabrik had tried to get Caspian to ally himself with the White Witch. It looked like he had given it some thought and almost considered it had Peter not stepped in, but she had almost tempted him too.

"But everything is okay now, right?" I asked Lucy and Peter. They glanced at each other with worried looks and said nothing.

I turned around and saw Caspian and Susan sitting close together talking and smiling. For some reason, I didn't like it. They joked, they smiled at each other, it was a little disgusting. But I couldn't put my finger on it. Why did I get this empty feeling in the pit of my stomach watching them?

Collin came back from meeting with the centaurs and I told him what happened and how Edmund stopped it. Collin was still on the fence about Edmund. Edmund was still a little distraught after the White Witch situation. He became even more detached from my brother and I.

Mother and Aunt Cassandra had been popping in every now and then whenever they could, wanting to get updates and give us advice. They, of course, will not be fighting along side us, but they said that they will be there when they are needed the most.

Sometimes, Mother would come by and talk to Edmund. It was weird seeing her happy and smiling and...in love. After thirteen hundred years, she still loves him unconditionally. It made my heart break. How much longer will he be here? When would be the next time he comes back?

We spent the next few days preparing for the battle we knew was sure to come. We sharpened our weapons, fitted our armor, came up with battle plans and strategies. Collin and I talked things over. We had doubts that we could win without help.

One day, a faun came running in to the Howe and announced that a Telmarin scout had spotted us. It was a matter of hours now. We rushed to get everything together. Weapons were being passed out and armor was being put on. Collin and I wore our flaming red cloaks made of material that looked like flames were licking at our backs. Underneath, we concealed our weapons. My sword hilt was sticking out and I rested my hand on it. Our knives were hidden away. Collin's bow was in his hand his quiver strapped to his hip.

We met at the Stone Table and talked about our battle plans. Our......father.......was to instigate a duel between the enemy and King Peter and they were to duel to the death. We were to wait and be prepared because Prince Caspian said that his uncle was deceiving and he could go back on his word at any moment.

The archers were to stand upon the outer walls of the temple, so Susan and Collin were to be stationed there and to watch over the proceedings. I was to be with King Peter and King Edmund.

By the time everything was ready to go, Edmund came into the cavern.

"Peter," he said, "You better come see this."

We went out onto a ledge and saw the enemy were just emerging from the tree line. They were vast in number.

When Edmund was finally ready to go over to the enemy , I accompanied him. A giant and a faun came along with us. I stood a distance from him as we started our walk across the open field to the enemy camp. Our swords at our sides and heads held high.

"So, you good with a sword?" he asked me.

"Yea, I guess," I said back after a minute or two. "Mother said I was a lot like my father because I was agile with a sword and clumsy with a bow. But I was always a natural she said."

He nodded and looked like he was deep in thought. Then he finally said, "Your mother was always the better swordsman than I was. She could get me on my back pretty fast even though I'd try my hardest to fight back, she was just always that good."

We were halfway across the field now.

Suddenly out of the blue, he stopped and grabbed my arm. I turned to face him and try to get my arm out of his grip only making him grip it tighter. "Celeste, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you and your brother, if I had known what would happen, I wouldn't have left your mother behind in Narnia, but look at you, you're thirteen hundred years old, I would have died in my 80's and left your mother alone anyway. I'd rather I left and come back than stay and never see you two where you are today. You're grown, you're mature. You and your brother are so amazing and I regret not being here to help raise you, but you cannot condemn me for my past. I'm not even sure if I can be a part of your future if we survive this. I don't know what happens when you die in Narnia when you're from the outside. Please, just don't hate me for something I couldn't control." Then he let go of my arm and started walking again.

I was a little taken aback by this. I followed after him but I realized that I really didn't hate him. I didn't care much for him. But with the amount of concern he was showing and the love he showed my mother, I didn't doubt that he didn't want to leave Mother and he would have wanted to raise us. The sadness in his eyes was because he wasn't there for our mother. He wasn't there to raise us. He wasn't there to protect Narnia. He wasn't there. And he regrets leaving.

I lowered my head as I felt guilty for judging. Collin would take a little more convincing, but I couldn't hate my absent father anymore. It wouldn't do me any good to resent him anymore. Like he said, he wouldn't be able to stay longer here, when everything was at peace, they would all go back and leave again. And who knew when the next time we'd meet would be.

I just had to forgive and forget. That's all.

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I know it's been a while since I last updated, and I'm so sorry. But thank you for those who are still with me. You keep me going.

Much Love, 

Courtney <3