Collateral Beauty: Dear Love

Dear Love

Dear Love,

You may not know me but I know you.

You may not know me but I know a lot about you.

I know about the immense amount of pain and joy you can bring.

I've felt your joy.

I've felt your pain.

I've felt your happiness, comfort and all your other emotions you have caused me. Both the good and the bad.

I've always wondered how something I cannot see can bring out such emotion within me.

You've made my heart, body and soul feel your attractiveness, warmth, kindness, beauty, intense joy, passion, tenderness, hurtfulness, and jealousy.

The attractiveness and interest of a boy I met for the first time.

The warmth and passion I feel when I share a kiss with him.

The deep romantic feelings I start to develop over time.

This so call chemistry. This so call bond and this so call "he is the one" became nothing. Nothing but a fading memory.

A memory that left scars. Scars with lessons that I've grown to love and hate.

Love.

I thought you would be there for and with me forever. I was on a path of total happiness. But then suddenly, I was roughly pushed off that path.

I suffered the difficult pain of jealousy seeing him with another girl.

Hurt, confusion and loss at wondering where things went wrong.

I was scared, hurt, in pain and most of all, lost.

I felt like I could never face you ever again. I wanted to run away. From the memories and from you.

But despite all that I don't regret anything. I may have felt your bad side but I also felt your good side. Your passion, warmth, joy, happiness, gratitude, serenity and all those cheesy cliché emotions.

Despite all I pain I went through I would never forget all the other wonderful feelings I felt.

The feeling of being loved as not only as a sister, friend, family but as a human being.

That was when I realized something. All this time when I thought I was alone and that I never felt you before, was all wrong.

All this time I had family and friends who truly loved me for who I was long before I met him. I felt you and got to know you from when I was a baby to now.

Not only had I received it but I had also gave some of my own. The love I gave my best friend when she lost her father, the love and support I gave my mother when she had to work overtime to support my sister and I. I've always felt you and yet I have never realized it until now.

You opened doors to all kinds of emotions I never thought I would experience.

You opened doors to all kinds of new paths that I never thought I would find. And so as I end this letter I have only two words for you.

Thank you.

- CC