Ugh, I am so fucking done w/ the human race I feel worthless and I feel like I can't do anything right no matter what I actually do.. It seems like I can never make my family happy. I lash out at people, I scare my friends I never actually stay calm. I am always filled with rage, I don't know what to do. If I rant to my friends they just yell at me, I can't rant my anger to my family.. They don't really understand how I have bottled up my anger. My life is so fucked up. It seems I get panic attacks at least 3 times a week for something stupid I did. My anger just bottles up and I will explode soon and I can't handle it anymore. Honestly I only feel wanted and feel like I can express my emotions on here, the internet. Ugh. I don't even know what to do anymore honestly. I want to lay in my bed and just stare at a wall most of the time. If it weren't for my internet friends I honestly wouldn't be here, writing to you now.I feel pathetic, weak, worthless. I can't handle it it feel like I can't do anything I do right even when I get all A's and B's in all of my classes I still feel like I can't do anything worthwhile. Everyone expects so high of me, but I feel like I can't reach their expectations it feels like i'm drowning in my emotions and can't reach the surface. I hate how I can't reach everyone's expectations everyone is so disappointed in me all the time and it feels like I can't actually do something right. The human race is actually fucked up, one minute people are your friends the next they are literally talking shut behind your back. This is what angers me. Like you can be all 'buddy buddy' with someone one day then the next they are talking so much shit behind your back and telling your friends so many damn lies that you feel like a sack of shit. Then the shit talking turns into face to face bullying, after this stage it goes either way, mental, emotional, physical or cyber. if it reaches cyber you are literally fucked over. All of your friends know, you lose your friends and then you start over. Make friends, fight with them, lose them. It's just how life is. Life can fuck you over at a young age. If you are lucky when you are older but i'm the fucking unlucky one and life fucked me over.
Word count: 445 words
~Grey
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Rant book?
RandomJust here for me to rant on and you to most likely not read And uhm, This includes swearing, depressing thoughts, self loathing amongst other things Uhm, my friend @breathiings made the cover for me so I don't take credit for the cover
