Forgetting

Day One

I am going to forget him. I mean he's a useless guy from the beginning. What did I see in him from the start?

Sure, he's good looking, and nice, and good at soccer, and plays the piano really well, and has a really nice smile, and is hard working, and sincere, and cheerful, and is a real gentleman, and has a voice that makes me melt inside, and an adorable dimple, and a really cool sense of style and...

No.

Bad girl.

I am not going to think about him, I am not going to think about him. Here is the deal, if I forget about him, then I can go out with that cute guy that asked me out last week...

So, what you're going to do tomorrow, when you see him at school is:

You say hi. And smile.

DO NOT smile too broadly.

DO NOT try to say anything else, or else it'll come out all wrong.

DO NOT act too girly around him. He is just another guy. There is no need to change yourself for him.

DO NOT deliberately look away from him.

DO NOT glance at him more than twice.

IF he talks to another girl too much, YOU WILL NOT stare at him.

IF he talks to you YOU WILL NOT stutter like an idiot.

IF he is close to you YOU WILL NOT hold your breath and YOU WILL NOT sweat.

...

Ok, you better not stuff up, woman.

Day Two

Disaster.

Out of all I said yesterday, I didn't do anything right... D:

Ok, ok, ok.

What I need to do is divert my attention. I am going to go talk to that guy who asked me out... what was his name again?

I don't think he'll like it if I don't know his name...

Ok. Tomorrow's plan:

You are going to find out that guy's name.

And you are going to say yes to him.

Organize the first date.

And you are going to stick to all that stuff you said on Day One.

...

I wonder if he'll get jealous... That would be nice...

No. Do not think about him. Think about the other guy... Goddamn what was his name??

...whatever.

Anyway, for tomorrow, if that bitch - no, she is not a bitch, if that girl from the next door form talks to him, then just look away...

Day Three

Ok, you are officially going out with that guy... No, his name is Evan... Keep that in your brain, feel free to think about it as much as you want... Go ahead and fall in love with him, by all means...

Date - movie

That is really boring...

... I heard that he was dumped by his ex when he took her fishing... That is hilarious.

...

He was dumped... Does he still like her, maybe?

Well, it's not like I care...

I saw the ex once when we competed against her school in netball... She was really pretty...

So what? It's not like I'm not pretty... But he doesn't look at me at all...

But Evan does. And that is all that matters.

Remove all thoughts of that guy.

Think about Evan...

He's really cute... But he's kind of...

Plain. And boring.

I mean, his voice is the ultimate monotone... Does he have no feeling?

...Ok.

Indifferent guys are cool. Ok? Indifferent guys are cool.

No matter how annoying they are, they are still cool. Make sure you remember that...

Enjoy your date with Evan tomorrow, do it wholeheartedly...

Day Four

Date with Evan finished.

Very uneventful.

But it's fine, because he's kind...

But he is kinder...

But that is fine, because Evan is cooler...

...Why does cool have to be so boring?

I wonder if he would've taken me fishing, if we ever dated...

He would probably day dream while waiting for a fish to come.

His face is so cute when he daydreams... I love it.

...

No you don't you little idiot.

Think about Evan. Think about Evan.

Evan Evan Evan.

No other guy must invade your mind...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Day Eighty-Two

Had a date with Evan today.

He took me fishing.

It was so fun!! He caught a that was about half as long as I was tall...

And I caught nothing...

It's so funny to watch Evan fish... He always concentrates on the line, like some enormous fish is going to catch on any second.

For some reason... I feel like fishing was special to me somehow.

...

Can't remember why though...