The Three Words

© 2011 BY HUICYEO 

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. NO PART OF THIS DOCUMENT MAY BE REPRODUCED OR TRANSMITTED IN ANY FORM OR BY ANY MEANS, ELECTRONIC, MECHANICAL, PHOTOCOPYING, RECORDING, OR OTHERWISE, WITHOUT PRIOR WRITTEN PERMISSION OF HUICYEO.

A/N:  First of all, this is a short story that I wrote for my college assignment so I hope that whoever who reads this would be able to give me constructive feedback on this because I really want to improve on my writing. Thanks for reading and I do hope that you would enjoy it. (:

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   I love you. Three simple words that I had wished with all my guilt and regret that I had said to her that day instead of all the horrid accusations which I had hurled to her. If only I know then that that would be the last time I will ever lain my eyes on her alive again, I would.

***

5 years earlier

     “Smile,” she said before snapping a picture of a puzzled him.

     It was a beautiful autumn day. A day so breathtakingly serene that anyone who looked out from their window could see squirrels collecting acorns hurriedly to store up for the impending winter that lies ahead, the sound of birds chirping lazily was heard and one could definitely smell the scent of fresh leaves hovering on the ground.  Sun shone brightly accentuating the yellowy reddish of the leaves that still adorned the two rows of trees that was separated by a lane.

     Blinking sleepily, he looked at her from behind his long lashes. She was a brunette with her hair cropped up so shortly that one would mistake her from a guy from behind. She was wearing casually in just a green t-shirt and jeans with a red scarf tangling from her neck and a pair of boots to accessorize her feet. She was also carrying a camera which she had just used to capture him napping under a big oak tree.  What captured his heart the most was the pair of animated grey eyes of hers that promised him that there was a great spirit inside the petite lass that stood grinningly in front of him.

     That was the start of their beautiful but short-lived relationship.

     He was a third year law student while she was a freshman just starting her course in photography. He was a guy who followed rules and regulations strictly and she was a free spirited adventurer who does things impulsively. He was a man of few words and she was a chatterbox. However, despite the obvious differences between them they complemented each other very well.

     After being with her, he found himself participating in whatever crazy thing that she had in her mind at that moment. From skipping lectures to have a picnic perched on the top of the hill to not putting on seatbelts while on a rollercoaster to staying up till morning to watch the sunrise instead of studying for his exam, he realized that she managed to loosen up the rigid him. She was his adrenaline; pumping his life with colour and fun that was never there before.  And yet he was nowhere near ready to mutter the three words which she had been yearning to hear from him.

     He was afraid that he was just her temporary adventure, that she would no longer be interested in him the moment he muttered the three words thus whenever she said them to him he responded by kissing her. He knew that she was unhappy with his reluctance to say those three simple words and yet he was so afraid that he might risk losing her that he pretended to be oblivious of her feelings.

     Three months into their courtship, she was diagnosed with a stage four malign brain tumour. She went through countless operations, chemotherapies and radiotherapies and yet her condition deteriorates day after day. He stood by her every step of the way and he dies a little more each day looking at how much she was suffering. Knowing what an adventurer she is, he encouraged her to recover by challenging her that the day she recovered would be the day he will finally mutter those three words to her. The challenge lifted her spirit at the beginning but towards the end he realized that she doesn’t have the will and spirit to fight against her illness anymore.

     Her doctor confirmed his worst fear one day by telling him that there was nothing else to be done for her anymore but to accompany her during her last phase of life. He was furious; furious at the doctor for not being able to save her, furious at her for not fighting hard enough and most of all furious at himself for not being able to do anything but to stand by and watch her die. With nowhere to lash his anger, he cowardly lashed them at her instead.

      “Why are you giving up so easily? Why can’t you fight harder? You said you loved me and yet you’re going to leave me. Why are you so selfish, Sophie? Why?” he hurled those accusations at her and stormed out of her room but not before he could hear her sobbing her heart out. She passed away that night itself.

***

Zach,

I had tried my hardest but maybe I’m just unworthy of your love. I love you and I always will.

Love,

Sophea

     Looking at the crumpled note with her writing scrawled on it, I remembered bitterly of how our relationship ended.  I accused her of being selfish when I was the one who was too selfish to see how much she were suffering by holding on to life. I was so selfish to let her go that I wouldn’t even tell her the three words which she had been yearning so hard to hear from me. When I think of her, which is every day, I will always remember her mischievous smile and the joy that glints from her eye whenever I reluctantly agree to go along with her crazy adventure and I will always regret what I had said to her that day.