Lips

Chapter 1

Riley

Black. That's what I see. Just black. No colors, no shapes, nothing.

Just black.

It was scary. Scary to be surrounded by darkness. Not just the color, but the emotion. The everlasting feeling of sadness. Sadness of waking up in the mornings. The sadness of being alive. All of it. All of it was scary. Sure there are ways of not being afraid of the darkness. A night light, a safety blanket, a coping mechanism. Drugs, alcohol, sex... Suicide. I tried the last one. Suicide. Everyone is so afraid of death. Of seeing it, of talking about it, experiencing it. But I'm not. I welcome it. I would open my arms wide and give it a huge bear hug if I could. If it was a person, it'd be my best friend. But on some level... It already is. The darkness is always around me. Always in my back pocket just waiting to pop out and say something. Always there.

Just there.

Maybe I was seeing darkness because it's 2:33 in the morning and I'm buried under six different blankets. I heard the front door open and close as my older brother got home. Then I heard his feet and another persons come up the steps. Then I heard the door to my room being opened. Usually if Ryan brings home a girl they go straight to his room. Not mine.

"Ri? Ri? I know you're up." Ryan's voice met my ears slightly muffled from the blankets being on top of me. I heard him shuffle and then my bed dip with his weight. The blankets on top of me were ripped off and the coldness enveloped my body. Blindly I started swinging my right arm around and smirked when I heard Ryan swear confirming me that I hit my target.

"Riiiiiiiii!" Ryan whined at me. Sighing I sat up and looked over at him. Ryan had a sheepish look on his baby face.

"What do you want Ryan... No, I don't have condoms to give you." I answered him before he could even ask his question. He gave a short unamused laugh and asked

"You know about first aid, right? You took a class last year didn't you?"

Why did he need to know if I knew first aid?

"Yea I know first aid. Why?" I questioned him. Was he hurt or something. "Why? Are you hurt? Ryan did you get in a fight? Are you hurt?" My thoughts were running wild with worry. If Ryan was hurt...

"No, no, no, I'm not hurt. But Tony is. He and this other guy got into a fright down a Frankie's. His eyebrow is messed up and he's got a bunch of scratches. So. " He said to me dragging out the o is so.

"Where is he?" I asked him right away. Tony was Ryan's best friend since birth and he is brothers with my best friend, Jeremy.

"Bathroom" Ryan answered standing up with me. I went over to my desk and pulled out my first aid kit them made my way to the bathroom. When I got to the door I saw tony standing at the mirror touching and wincing at his eyebrow.

"Don't touch it you moron!" I scolded him. He have me a small smile and sat on the toilet seat. I rolled my eyes and set down the first aid kit. I opened it up and put on the gloves they provide for you. I looked over at Tony and saw he was staring at my ass. I mean I was only in Ryan's old t-shirt and no pants. You could just see the bottoms of my frog underwear. I smirked and thought about how I could get him back later. I grabbed the rubbing alcohol and put some on a Q-tip. I walked over to him and bent down.

"This might sting a little." I told him. I looked him in the eyes when I put the Q-tip to his spilt open eye brow. With a little more force than necessary.

"Fuck. Come on Ri, what was that for?" Tony's deep pain ridden voice made me smirk a little.

"That's for starting at my ass." I said with a chuckled a little when I saw his face turn bright pink. I finished up cleaning and bandaging his cuts and closed my first aid kit when Tony said