If ...

Chapter 12

a/n : the story's events will begin to come all together . hopefully you'll enjoy reading this chapter   xx 

don't be a silent reader and vote / comment , make me know you exist , love y'all  .

                 

The room was full , all six pair of eyes were on me . waiting for me to say something .

But no words escaped my lips. Every single one of them looked at me with a different emotion . they're glances suffocated me. I wanted to say a million things yet at the same time I wanted to stay like this .

After my small outburst , the three men ; zac , zayn & cris ; were on their phones making phone calls.

An hour later everyone is here .

The air was thick with tension .

Next to me , on the bed was sitting kylie . a new kylie, a total new kylie . when she first stepped in the room , my jaw was floor length open . the girl who walked through the door isn't the same girl I left back home , she is an adult now, which left me with the question I don't know the answer to " how long was I gone ?"

On the chair next to my bed was cris.

Gigi was sitting on zayn's lap , who himself was sitting next to my feet on the bed .

While zac was settled next to my monitor.

And my mom , was standing by the door , on the far end of the room ; in another expression ; far away from me .

When she came , she didn't hug me nor came near me , it was as if I just saw her , as if I'm no daughter to her .

She gave me a sad smile , and mouthed "I love you"

I didn't understand why wouldn't she come greet me the way she used to , the way a mother would do in a situation similar to the one I am in ..

and when I saw the death glares everyone was shooting her , not excluding anyone , I knew that what cris had said was unfortunately ... true .

No one spoke to her , not even kylie , and it's what surprise me the most , because kylie and my mom were impossibly close .

Everyone is here , everyone except for one person , one single person , everyone is here except for cara .i wanted to ask where was she but I was scared of the answer . maybe we had a fight , yes that'd be it . but I know that no fight , no matter how serious it can be , will stop her from coming here to the hospital . maybe she has a casting or a shooting , cara never uses her phone while shooting. or maybe , just maybe , she had no signal , or her phone died when the boys were calling her , and she doesn't know I'm awake .

Who am I kidding ?

Deep inside I know that cara isn't here , because something happened , something bad happened , something really bad ..

And I'm afraid of the answer .

I can't seem to get my mind off cris's words , they keep repeating themselves in the back of my head "or that cara had di-"

Do I want to know the answer ?

I need to.

" w-where's cara ?" the words left my mouth before I could stop them .

I looked at all of them , waiting for an answer , I don't want to hear .

Gi's eyes watered , and before she could speak , zayn beat her

" uh , cara is , um –" he scratched the back of his neck , an act he only does when he's trying to make up a lie , which he always fail to do . zayn is just a terrible liar , he can't lie even if his life depended on it ,"-she is not here , she can't come now " he squeezed my leg and shot me a sad smile .

"Not here ? w-what happened ?" I said , asking the question and stuttering for the nth time today .

Zac gave me a reassuring smile " don't worry , we will tell you everything , but you need to promise me to stay calm , if I ever see your pulse getting over 120 , we'll stop , you just woke up –" he looked over the five people in the room , but fixed his eyes on cris in a warning , threatening tone ,then continued " and I won't take any risks "

" so shall we start ? " zayn spoke

I took a deep breath and nodded my head yes .

Cris rubbed his face and looked at me , his face holding all kind of emotions , but the ones that his eyes held , held me captive . and the way he looked at me gave me a warm feeling I'd trade anything in this world , just to keep feeling it .

Then his smooth voice invaded the room

"it all started when ..."