Irresistible

Irresistible - Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I was laying on my bed drawing. Every second looking up at the picture of a girl, that I decided to draw, at my lap top. Music softly playing.. I was so focused to give my best. I wanted this draw to be something I will be proud of. I always want. Every time I draw. I try to make every drawing better then the last one. Sometimes it works and sometimes it don't. I always loved drawing only with my pencil,no lot of coloring,just shadows. That's my thing. I was just trying to make a shadow in the eye when I heard a high-pitched voice of my mother yelling from downstairs.

Marija (my mom) : " Djordjija diner is ready! "

Me: " I'm not hungry! "

Marija: " Geet down here da ti ne bi ja dosla gore i dovukla te vamo! "

Me: " Uggh, fineeee! I'll be there in five minutes! "

Why do they always interrupt me when I have inspiration. I'm not even hungry, I gained enough fat so I wouldn't mind skipping the meal. But my parents would never let me to go on a diet or skip a meal. They are always saying to us that we have to eat..I guess my dad is really scared of anorexia. Anyways, I turned down music and went downstairs.                                                                               

Already when I stepped into the hall I could feel the smell of fried bacon. I entered into the kitchen and saw my younger brother Tom at the table eating. I kissed his head and sat next to him on my chair. My mom was handing me the plate with food.

Me: " Where's dad? "

Marija: " I guess he's done with work but he promised me that he will go to see that guy John and try to find me some job. Since I got fired at the bank it's harded to take care of children,your school,all the bills... "

I didn't said anything. Just kept eating my bacon. I never understood why she just didn't draw. Her works are amazing. I guess I got talent from her. She was doing it rarely and only for her pleasure. But she could easily sell those portraits and pictures. My dad works as a security in some company. His name is Bob. He's from England. He and my mom met when she was on a trip to London,they fell in love and after they got married he came to Serbia and now we're living here. I love this country,I can speak and understand Serbian,Croatian,Bosnian and all those similar languages and English cause we mostly speak in English because of my dad. He knows Serbian only a little and the way he pronounces the words is funny. I've never been in England,but I really want to. I always wanted to see London. Dad promised me we'll go once. And I have a younger brother Tom as you could figure out already. He's four and he's absolutely the most adorable child I've ever seen. I love him so much. But he can be a brat sometimes.

When Tom finished his meal mom said : " Tom idi u svoju sobu and don't make a mess. "

He left.

Marija: " Uradila si sve sto treba za skolu? "

Me: " Yes. "

Marija: " Okay,then.When you finish skloni to. "

I didn't said anything again. I ate everything and put my plate into a sink. I went to my room and closed the door. Awesome,now I don't have will to draw anymore. I took my lap top and went on facebook and twitter. Nothin' special. My life is lame. I don't have a lot of friends and even those I have are always using me. But I am too shy and it's really hard for me to make new ones. They use me but they're still there. And I know them very well. Some of them almost my whole life. That reminds me. In three days I'm gonna turn 17. How awesome is that? And I don't even have enough friends to make a party.. I've never had a boyfrined or kissed anyone. I'm a faliure. In every possible way. I even wanted to start to cut but gave up. If my dad found out I could call myself dead. It's weird,you know? I have a normal life..I mean,we're not poor,we're normal family..I don't have problems,I'm a good student,I have "friends", but still... I've never felt satisfied,never truly happy. I had a crush on one guy but I can't claim that it was something real. He never noticed me. I don't know why,but I have a feeling that no one ever liked me and that no one was ever in love with me. I'm not sure why. I mean I'm not pretty but also I don't think I'm so ugly that no one could ever approach me. And the fact that I love love makes it even worse. I'm a romantic person. That's why I found a place where love is perfect,where I fall in love with every person,every word,every thought of theirs. Books. I recetly read Wuthering Heights and I absolutely love it.

That's my escape from this sick world.

I realized that if I continue sinking into thoughts like this I'm just gonna make it worse. I took my pajamas and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Then came back and tucked into bed. I love to lie surrounded with pillows and covered with my quilt. I feel safer. Soon I fell asleep.

Alarm woke me. I hate school. I decided to sleep five more minutes. But when I opened my eyes again I saw I'm late. I jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom. Then I speedily find what to wear and changed. I looked myself in the mirror and realized I look horrible. I quickly put powder on my face,mascara on lashes and lipgloss on my lips. I usually do a lot more but I'm a moron and I have to be late. I didn't have time to straighten my hair and it was messy and wavy, so I made a bun. Quickly took my bag and started running. I better be there on time. I don't need another unwarranted hour.

.........

These couple of days flew so fast. Today when I woke up everyone wished me happy 17th birthday and gave me presents. I got earrings from dad,which was really thoughtful from him. New book from mom. And Tom drew me something. He told me it's me and him,but all I could see was bunch of colors on the paper. I pretended to see and I gave him a big kiss on the cheek. This really made my day. I was so happy because of the presents. Plus it's Saturday so there's no school. I put Tom's drawing into my sketchbook. He's such a sweetheart. But I was mostly interested in a surprise my mom talked about last two days. She said I'm gonna find out on my birthday even if it's not for me,but she thinks it's gonna make me happy.So I asked her: " Moooom? You remember what you said? "

Marija: " What are you talking about? "

" Surprise. " I said with a grin on my face.

Marija: " I see. You didn't forget. "

Me: " Of course not. "

She smiled.

Me: " So? "

Marija: " Remember what I told you about that John guy dad talked with? "

Me: " Yeah? "

Marija: " Well he found me job. In London. "

I froze. In London? But how she thinks to do that? We're not even near England.I guess she realized I'm not sure how to react so she started talking: " You see,he found me job there,but obviously I can't go to London and leave you here. So first we rejected the offer. But then he offered your dad better job. I mean he's gonna work as a security also but for more money. So we decided to go to live in London. " she finished with a smile.

I was still staring at her not believing.

Me: " But where are we gonna live? You will by a house just like that? From which money? "

Marija: " We're not. You have an aunt. From your dad's side. You never met her. Well,she lives in London,and she lives alone. So we talked to her..She's gonna come here and we're gonna live in her house. "

Me: " But? But? How big is that house? Where is that house? What about school? Friends? We're gonna leave it all here? What about Jackie? I love this country mom. "

Marija: " House is a little bit bigger then ours. You'll have your room. It's in some back part of the London. Your dad knows. I'ts not crowded as the center of the London. You'll gonna go there to school. Ana and Maja will understand..and beside I don't see you hanging out with them so much anymore. I'm not sure about Jackie. I know hunny,but we're not gonna sell the house. If something goes wrong we can always come back and switch with your aunt Jenna. "

Me: " But it's a lot more crowded then Belgrade. I'm not going anywhere without Jackie. That needs to be clear. "

Marija: " Fine. Then we'll take him with us. "

Me: " Okay. " I smiled widely cause I was actually really happy.I always wanted to see the London. And like mom said. If something goes wrong, we can always come back.

Me: " So,when are we going? "

Marija: " Tomorrow in the evening. "

I looked at her surprised. I should start packing then. I have a feeling that this is gonna be a good trip. It has to be, I though and smiled.