Painless➰Sidemen AU✔️

0.7

Youth-Daughter
•Macy's POV•
"It was fine" I mumbled and folded my arms, I didn't like admitting how shit my life was, I didn't like feeling sorry for myself, and I certainly didn't like others doing so for me.
"Why?" Josh glanced me beside him
"I don't like feelings" I spoke like it was a bad word, I truly despised them.
"You don't like a lot of things" Simon rolled his eyes, jokingly.
"Well sorry, father" I looked over to see both of the men, that were to my right, had a scowl on their face.
"I'm your dad!" Josh whined after a small laugh as we got into the car.
"Daddy Josh!" Simon cheered and started to drive
"I will never call any of you daddy, Christ" I rolled my eyes but couldn't help to smile
"Thank fuck" Simon mumbled, concentrated on driving
"Do you guys want to stop at Nando's?" Josh looked up from his phone
"Of course." Simon said like it was obvious. I just shrugged my shoulders, not really comfortable with the idea. I saw Simon grimace through the mirror.
"You don't have to eat Macy, please try though" Simon was sad, I could see it in his eyes.
"I want to" I sighed. I really did, for them, for me.
"Are you sure?" Josh turned around as if to study me
"Yup" My lips formed a small thin smile, not making eye contact with them.
"Okay." He said unsurely.
We got to Nando's and got a table by the window. As Simon and Josh talked among themselves I stared out at all the busy people. Walking up and down the hectic high street. A couple, a family, an old man, a group of friends. All getting on with their lives. One foot in front of the other. I stared at them in wonder. There were so many questions you could ask. Because you don't know, one of them girl's parents could have died or that guy could be depressed. There are so many questions you can't ask. I could feel someone's eyes watching me. I slowly ripped my eyes off the smiling happy couple and down to my bruised hands. I knew what I was having, wedges. Nothing big but something. I hoped that it would make them a little proud, they were my reason for trying. I watched as Simon's long skinny hand lightly gripped mine. My eyes went from my hands and slowly up to Simon's eyes, pulling away from my hands in the process. A small frown formed on his as I shook my head. I didn't do contact. I could barely look people in the eyes.
"Why can Ethan hug you?" Simon asked, the annoyance obvious in his voice. I couldn't tell him why, I didn't want anyone to know why, because liking him was bad, I knew it was bad. I shook my head lightly and looked back down at the table.
"Leave it, yeah?" I heard Josh mumble to Simon.
"What can I get you?" The person who I was assuming the waitress asked as I looked up. Perfect blond hair in a high ponytail with her makeup done perfectly. Jenny. I knew her from school. The two guys ordered and she didn't even look at me never mind ask.
"Um didn't you forget something" Simon shifted uncomfortably as she was about to walk away with a flirty look on her face.
"Oh yeah" She smirked and handed him a piece of paper that I knew straight away was her number. "Call me"
"No I meant about my friend" He rolled his eyes sliding back the note on the table
"Oh that anorexic bitch, I don't think she needs food" She rolled her eyes and looked at me in disgust. I looked back down at my hands and watched as tears dripped onto them.
"I thought your parents finally killed you, Violet" She sneered at me before leaving. She used my name, my real name. I stopped calling myself that when my mum died, and she somehow found it out. I didn't move, I simply looked at my hands and watched the increasing amount of tears drip onto them. She was one of my previous bullies. There were about ten of them, maybe more. I didn't keep track, the same pain from different people. I could hear them asking if I was alright. I didn't reply, couldn't. I simply got up and walked out the door. That walk soon became faster and faster until I was running down the busy streets of Stratford. I ran across bridges and through roads with tears pouring out of my eyes until I ended up at a park. I wasn't from this part of London so I had no idea where I was going but this park was beautiful. I loved parks, they were calming. I wiped away my tears and watched the world around me.
My eyes couldn't move from the river. I wanted to join my mum. Almost like a puppet I got up from the bench and walked towards the river. Sitting down and crossing my legs, dragging my finger along the fast flowing water. Watching as rain drops fell slowly melting into the quick stream.