Intoxicated, Paranoia, and a lot of Pain

Everyone walked around me when they saw me walking down the hall to my locker.

"Hey Ronnie, you know, it surprises me everyday when you walk through that door," Zyla said as she and her friend walked up to me.

Don't say anything, don't look at her in the eye I told myself as I closed my eyes behind my long messy hair.

"Why don't you just kill yourself? Nobody wants you here. You're weird, smelly, repulsive, you'll be doing everyone a favor, really," She said as she looked at me hair in disgust.

I jumped as she slammed my locker.

"See you in class ronnie. That's if...you decide to show up," Zyla said while smiling and walking down the hallway.

I opened my locker and got out my english notebook. I slammed my locker. Why couldn't I stand up to her!?! I thought to myself. She's just one ignorant girl!

I could see Bliss walking up to Zyla from where I was standing. She was my best friend, my only friend. But she told me that during school she would be Zyla's friend. See Bliss and I plan to slowly destroy Zyla together. We have to pretend we don't know each other, well we have to pretend we hate each other if we want this to work.

I started walking down the hallway after Zyla and her friends had left the hallway. I knew I would be late again but it was worth it if I didn't have to face Zyla and her friends.

"Nice of you to grace us with your presence, Ronnie," my english teacher said.

If only he knew why I was late all the time, I thought, I wouldn't be the one getting the snarky comments all the time.

I sat in the back and looked down at my notebook the whole class time. I could feel the eraser pieces and paper balls hit my hair throughout the entire class time.

I walked out of my last class and could see Zyla approaching me, I hugged my notebook and ran out the school, across the parking lot and toward the woods. She never followed me there. I hid behind a tall tree and could feel my heart thumping under my black hoodie.

I began walking, dodging trees, and trying not to step on any sharp rocks.

I looked up at the blue-gray sky and saw my house across the street from the side of the woods I came out of.

"Ronnie, Ronnie, Ronnie...did you really think you could escape me that easily?"

I squished my eyes together knowing this was going to hurt.  

I felt the heel of Zyla hit my back. I fell on the rocky ground as Zyla turned me around with a kick. I felt her sit on top of me and begin punching my face. I tasted the blood squirting out from the inside of my mouth, it tasted like iron and water mixed together.

I laid there looking up at the stars as a tear rolled down my dirty, bloody face. My stomach felt as it had been stabbed as I got up. I hugged it and walked to the back of my house where the window to my room was. I opened it with my bruised hand and climbed in.

I walked over to my door and could hear my mother talking to my cousin who had moved in with us after her mother abandoned her last year. I opened my door and ran to the bathroom across the hall.

I untied my shoes and threw them off quickly. I lifted my shirt and sweater to see a purple, bluish spot beginning to form on my stomach. I looked up in the mirror and saw my lip cracked and my neck with the same kind of bruise my stomach had. I turned on the water and rose it till it was burning hot.

I walked in and could see the water falling from my body turn a scarlet red. I screamed inside from the pain the water caused as it hit every inch of my bruised body.

I stared at my hands as I came out of the shower, tiny cuts from the rocks became clear. I walked to the mirror and grabbed my moms foundation and began applying it to the dark blue bruises on my face.  

"Ronnie?" I could hear my mom walking down the hall toward the bathroom door.

"I'll be out in a minute," I responded in a shaky voice. Shit! I hope she doesn't notice. I think I made it tooo obvious.

I grabbed some sweat pant s and tshirt and walked out toward my room.

"All yours," I said quickly. As I slammed my door.

"Ronnie! open the door. you have not eaten young lady," I heard my mom say outside my door.

"I already ate. I ate out with Bliss."

I sat down on my bed hugging my stomach. I looked out the window and could see Bliss staring at me. She climbed in quickly and closed the window behind her.

"What are you doing here?"

"Zyla bragged about what she did to you and I wanted to make sure you were fine," she said as she brought out a bag of ice from her back pack.

She handed it to me and I placed it on my stomach and felt a relief of pain as the ice began to numb my stomach.

"Thanks," I said. "Now go."

"okay," she responded as she hugged me and climbed out the window again.

I fell on my bed and stared at my Falling in Reverse poster on my ceiling."...To be the last one standing up...and I will never be... the one you can defeat..."  

It won't be like this forever, Ronnie, I promise I murmured to myself.