Alex, The Voice

This is a story of a girl who would do anything to get her hands on a razor. But there's this voice that's saying,"Don't do it..." It's something she can explain. The girl is me...But who's the voice?

There's a lot of things that are killing me inside but the main reason is my sister. My sister calls me names like bitch, slut, etc. She would even say stuff like no one loves you, kill yourself, etc. Sometimes words hurt more than punches. I wondered to myself," Why am I the victim?"

And one day I couldn't take it anymore. I went to the garage then to the basement trying to find a rope. I already had a chair... I couldn't find one so instead I went to the bathroom, grabbed a razor, but before I did "it", I heard a voice saying," Don't do it..." I got scared so I walked out of the bathroom, went into my room, and cried into my pillow, so my mom wouldn't hear me.

When she came in to get a diaper for my brother she sees the tears and asks," Whats wrong?" I just lie and say," My stomach hurts." As I shed my last tear for that night. My mom leaves me to change my brothers diaper.

Every night now, I hear the voice saying he loves me and cares for me. The next day I woke up and as usual my sister's mad and grumpy. I start to get ready for school. I'm in the bathroom putting away the razors when I hear the voice once again saying," Never..."

At school I still get bullied but less hurtful. But I still keep my head up. Staying strong. But now after school, the "voice" is there waiting for me at my bus stop where I get off. I think we're friends now. I talk to him every day. Except my sister thinks I'm a loner and a freak for talking to "something's that not there". But I know he's there, protecting me. But I stay quite.

When we get home, all of a sudden my sister turns really happy and yells," Angel!" and gives him a big great hug. I bet she doesn't love me as mush as she loves Angel. Then I try to give him a hug. He doesn't let me. He doesn't like or love me. I think he uses me for my phone and tv. Then my sister says," I call the bathroom." Why does she get to go first?

I get along with my dad and mom just fine. But not to well with my siblings.

His name's Alex. Last night he told me that he passed away from cutting too much.Maybe that's why he said," Don't do it..." He tells me every night how special I am to him. And that he loves me, never gonna let me go, etc. I think we have a connection. Even if he's from "a different world". He still won't tell me where he's from, how old he is, or what he looks like. I think he's just shy.

He sometimes follows me to school and into calsses. He sometimes helps me with homework too. And when some one says something mean to me, he just puts his hand on my shoulder to show that he's here.

So, it's been 2 weeks now since I first met him. He finally told me what he looks like and how old he is!He said he has black long hair that covers one eyes, snake bites, and a tattoo that shows a letter stapled to a heart that says," Take me" and that he's 18.I hope he's not lying. And he said he can't tell me where he's from because it's breaking one of the rules. Whatever that means. Oh and it's been 2 weeks since I haven't cut or thought about suicide! Can you believe it?! He's always been there for me. He's my best friend.

He said at one point in my life he's gonna have to go. I cried that night. He said,"You can make it without me.And even if I'm not there, I will be in your heart." Just as he said that, he left. That was the last time I saw him. And still missing him, loving him, and wondering where he is right now.

He's the one who made me forget all the razors, suicidal thoyghts, hurt ness, sadness,etc.

My sister doesn't bully me anymore neither do the popular girls at school. But when I see them picking on someone else, I do what Alex would've done, and I stand up for the person who's getting bullied. I know I'll see him after I pass away... In a "parell universe" as what he would call it.

This story goes out to all those people who have ever felt the same way I felt. STAY STRONG <3

P.s sorry that's it really short! If you want another part come talk to me! :)