Fighter |No Longer writing|

Part 53

Kat’s POV

“So how are you adjusting to everything?” Dr. C asked me. I never wanted to return to the hospital, but to leave it in the first place I had to agree to come back and talk to Dr. Calloway.

“I’m starting to get used to some things,” I said as I glanced around the room.

“How did you feel when you first entered your house?”

I didn’t answer her question, “Like you said, it’s going to take time to readjust.” 

Dr.C nodded and wrote something down. I looked around the same office I was forced in when I stayed here. Nothing had changed since I had left.

“The girls have been asking about you,” Dr. C told me.

“Can I see them?” I asked wanting to see only one person.

“You know where to find them,” Dr. C rose from her chair, “Just sign out when you leave.”

  With that I left the office and headed for the living area. Tess, Gwen and Johanna were sitting on the couch watching tv. Little Zoe was sitting in the corner all alone. I didn’t disturb them, and continued my never ending mission. I couldn’t cave, I couldn’t back down against those puppy dog like eyes. I needed to end my wandering assumption’s, and figure out the truth.

   I took a deep breath and reminded myself why I was there. My knocking was pointless. Alicia already knew I was there.

“You’re back,” she didn’t sound fragile as she usually did. She sounded confident.

“Yeah. I have a few appointment’s booked to see Dr. Calloway,” I explained. I was thinking of what to say next before Alicia spoke.

 “I’ve actually been participating now, in the groups. I’ve learned something,” I took a seat at her deck chair as she continued, “It’s not healthy to keep things bottled up, shutting people out. None of those things. I’ve learnt it’s ok to be yourself, there will always be someone judging you, but that’s a part of life.”

I couldn’t help but smile. Alicia had progressed so much from the girl I once knew.

“I’m glad you’re thinking that way.”

Alicia nodded, “And I’ve also been thinking about the secret,” Alicia was now focused on the floor.

All of my goals melted away. I didn’t want to bring up a memory, especially seeing how well she was doing.

“No, it’s fine. You don’t have to tell me,” I shook my head.

“I want to,” Alicia trailed off, “Do you love him?”

“What?” I lost my breath at the end of the question, “No I don’t,” I shook my head.

“You’re lying, because if you were saying the truth, you would’ve asked who I was talking about,” I stayed silent. She had a point, and there was no denying anything to her now.

“I just keep thinking, about the way you always admire him. I don’t want to be the one who changes the way you look at him,” I nod along. Understanding where she was coming from. I let my guilt take over, and voice over my actions. After speaking to Alicia I signed out and left. 

   I made no prgress in finding out about Harry's past, but now viewed it in a different way. If Harry went through that much trouble to keep it from me, it must be bad. But i wanted him to tell me himself than.

   My dad was just letting start to drive again. It felt weird. I pulled in to the lane way and went straight to the side garage and parked my car. I walked in to the house and could smell fresh cinnamon rolls. I let my nose lead the way and found myself in the kitchen.

“Those smell delicious,” I opened my eyes to see Martin wasn’t the only one standing at the counter. Kyle smiled at the sight of me.

Harry’s POV

    My ears were still ringing from the screams and standing next to the speakers all night. I lied in my bunk on the bus, staring at my phone. I scrolled through pictures of Katherine. Missing her began to hurt, more than I could’ve ever imagined.

  The urge to call her dug deeper every day. Thinking of the consequences of one call pushed me to turn my phone off. I need to create space between us, this is good for her. I never said it was easy, but it was for the best.

   I turned on my side, facing in to my bunk. My curtain was drawn, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

     The plane ride home just never ended. It seemed to take for ever before I was in my car driving to Clive’s. I was surprised to be welcomed through the gates and had nowhere to park.  I left my car at the end of the steps, to anxious to care what people would say to me. I grabbed the white roses I had ordered and left my car.

   I knocked on the door, hearing loud mumbles made me nervous. Martin quickly opened the door, a frown on his face. Before I stepped inside I could see the house was packed.

“What’s going on?” I asked over the murmurs.

When Martin opened his mouth, his lower lip shook.

“Harry,” I turned to be met by Clive. I had to admit he looked terrible. He looked like he hadn’t slept in days, but his black suit threw me off.

“What’s going on?” I asked Clive. He looked down to the flowers I had in my hand and tears flowed from his eyes. He wrapped his arms around me. I didn’t know what to do, so I gently patted him on the back.

“She’s gone,” he said in to my shoulder. His body began to shake. The fresh cut flowers slipped from my hands. My lips parted, eyes screwed shut. Images of a sharpened blade being dragged across her scarred wrist flashed through my mind. Pills sliding down her throat, creating a pile in her stomach made my mouth go dry.

I began to hyperventilate, “Katherine.”

  Tears streamed down my face harder than ever before.

“No! Katherine!” I yelled one last time before everything went black.

“Harry! For gods sake!” I awoke drenched in my own sweat. Niall and Louis were standing outside of my bunk, looking at me. My chest rose and fell rapidly, I dragged my hand across my damp forehead and felt my curls brush against the back of my hand.

“Are you alright?” Louis asked after a few moments of silence.

“Yeah. Sorry,” I apologised for waking them up and turned back over. I listened as they climbed back in to bed and that’s when reality sunk in. It’s funny how at night, that’s the time when your mind seems to wander places, where it just won’t allow you to go during the day. 

(Hello my lovely readers! I Just wanted so say how much I appreciate all of your reads/votes/ comments! All of them mean a lot!!!! I was just wondering if you girls wanted me to start doing these little author notes at the end of each chapter. If you guys do please let me know and commetn below:D And please comment your thoughts at the end of each chapter. Lots of love from Canada.xx)