Seeing Through the Cracks

Chapter 9

I was enjoying an outdoor winter party with my husband, Brian, and our son, Nicholas, chatting with friends, and someone asked, "Will you and Brian be having another child?"

I remember my answer so distinctly. I replied, "No, we're not planning to have another child for at least another year. Nicholas is three years old now and more independent; we're just enjoying some romance again in our marriage."

It was true, we'd had this discussion earlier that week and we were both happy with waiting. Motherhood had been especially difficult for me for the first two years and I was happy now to be feeling much more confident and stable. Brian and I had more time to spend together, and we wanted to capitalize on that opportunity. But we were definitely looking forward to having another child eventually and a sibling for Nicholas.

About two weeks later I remember standing at the kitchen sink, washing dishes, when I was suddenly overcome with a familiar nauseous feeling in the pit of my belly. Later that week, the doctor confirmed that I was pregnant again. Waiting another twelve months was no longer an option, and I immersed myself immediately in the joy of growing a second child in my belly. I couldn't be happier.

This pregnancy was much easier than the first; it was the delivery that was more of a challenge. This baby was in a bit of a rush to arrive, coming two weeks before the due date. After a few hours of labour and just a couple of quick pushes from me, our baby boy flew out, way too fast, and clipped his shoulder against my tailbone. The pain was searing! Tears of agony were mixed with tears of happiness; we had another healthy son. We named him Jacob. He was just one ounce bigger than his big brother and just as beautiful.

We all instantly fell in love with Jacob. Nicholas was over the moon about having a baby brother, and he was so good with him from the very beginning. I spent my first six weeks, post-partum, sitting on a coccyx cushion to heal my tailbone. I know it's cliché to say that your child can be a pain in the butt, but at that time, mine most definitely was. In no time, my lower back felt better, and the first few months of caring for Jake came more easily. I had more confidence, this time, as a mother.

At five months old, Jacob came down with what appeared to be stomach influenza, and lost three pounds. The doctor didn't seem too concerned at that time, but over the next several months it appeared that Jacob was not rebounding back to full health. He developed a deep cough that would cause his little body to shake. He then began to suffer with chronic diarrhea, and at times projectile vomiting and his skin would break out in rashes and hives. He was pale and anemic, and his growth slowed down considerably. He eventually plummeted from the ninety percentile on his baby growth chart to below the twenty-five percentile, and then his growth plateaued for six months. Strangely and ironically, the family doctor believed he would grow out of this phase, choosing to offer no medical solution. We took matters into our own hands, and got a referral to a gastro specialist in the top children's hospital in the city through a doctor friend of ours. Jacob was beginning to lose muscle mass in his thighs by the time he was finally seen. Many tests were done, including a bowel biopsy, but the results were inconclusive, leaving the doctors baffled, and my husband and I fraught with fear and inadequacy. The medical system was not working in our favour. Jacob was withdrawn, quiet, lethargic and continued to remain underweight.

Months later, with still no answers, during a two-week period three different people suggested to me to seek the help of a holistic health practitioner who specialized in something called Iridology. I had never heard of this, but after the third person urged me, I took it as a sign. I was desperate to get help for my child and really had nothing to lose by looking at a complimentary modality. I did some research and learned that Iridology is the science of reading the nerves within the iris to assess the nutritional health in the body, and I was open and willing to meet with this person to have Jake assessed.

Although it is not a tool used for diagnosis, seeing the core of nutritional deficiencies can be helpful. The Iridologist believed Jake's large intestines to be inflamed, and that both Yeast and Staphylococcus bacteria had settled there. Jacob's diet was restricted to alkaline foods, and we added an age-old herbal remedy called Slippery Elm powder to his food to literally soothe and put out the fire in his belly. Live bacterial culture in the form of Probiotics powder was also included to restore the bacterial flora in his gut.

Within a couple of weeks we saw enormous improvements in Jacob's health; the diarrhea stopped, the cough lessened in intensity, his skin cleared, and he began to gain weight. The gastro specialist called me at home to discuss tests results done before we began this new course of action. Once again, the test didn't reveal anything. As she was discussing our next move, I explained to her that we had seen an Iridologist and shared her assessment and recommendations.

The doctor immediately said, "That's impossible; Staph infection doesn't ever reach the bowels."

I then expressed how well Jacob was responding and how much better he was doing.

She then said, "I take that back. Doctors have never been able to prove that Staph infection doesn't reach the bowels. Whatever you are doing now for your son, I approve. The medical field has obviously not been helpful. Keep doing what you're doing, and if you require me in the future do not hesitate to make an appointment."

I was grateful for this admission and honesty from a medical doctor and thanked her for all she'd done to help. I hung up the phone finally feeling hopeful that our son was going to be well again.

There was no looking back; Jacob thrived again, both physically and emotionally. That placid little toddler gained weight and caught back up on the growth chart over the next six months. And as his body grew and strengthened, so did his personality, in big ways! He suddenly became a child of great determination, with a lot of time to make up for. He became tenacious and defiant, typical of a two-year-old, but with more ferocity. He hungered for food and for physical activity, and I could barely keep up with him. It was as though I had to get to know who Jacob was all over again; a new person was evolving before me, and this person required a different approach than the one used with a fragile sickly child. It was wonderful and it was a relief, and it was a very busy time for both of us.

This event woke me up to the fact that our medical system is fallible, and that Jake had nearly slipped through the cracks of a less than stellar system. Thankfully I was able to catch him before he fell through and became more ill, or worse. My advocating for Jake became highlighted, and it was vital that I sought a different method to regain his health. It would not be the last time Jake's unique needs would have him slip through a loosely structured system. The road ahead was filled with barriers that would require close observation, determination and inventiveness.

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