Soulless (Justin Bieber Love Story / Fan Fiction)

XXI

XXI.
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Song of the chapter:
Reflection by Fifth Harmony
(so random idk i love the song and Anna throws some motivational girl power shit in this chapter so it kinda fits lol)
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Before I pushed open the red door that lead to Anna's home, I took one glance over my right shoulder to see if Justin was still there. He was, but I couldn't quite see him due to the dark tint in his windows.

It was strange to know that it had only been a few seconds, and I kind of missed him. I missed talking to him, hearing what his thoughts were on everything, and most importantly, I kind of missed kissing him. And by kind of, I meant really.

I turned the doorknob and pushed the door open. Anna was expecting me, and I never had to knock anymore. I was over there enough, and her parents insisted that I walk in without knocking even though it made me feel a bit intrusive.

The downstairs was quiet. I assumed her parents weren't home, and I walked up the white carpeted staircase to her room.

"Anna," I opened the door to her room slowly when I got there.

She was laying on her bed flat on her stomach with her head towards the end of the bed. It made me think of how Justin and I watched The Notebook and lay just like that.

Her head lifted. I could tell she was about to casually greet me until she saw what I was wearing, which caused her eyes to widen and mouth to drop slightly.

"Kennedy," her voice was low. "Are those--"

"Yeah," I groaned in aggravation. "I don't even know how he got anything to happen, he's just so good at it, Ann!"

I fell down on the bed beside her, exhaling tiredly.

She moved to a sitting position and stared down at me, tucking her long brown hair behind her ear. "You didn't--"

"No!" I interrupted again. "No, we didn't have sex. Swear on my life. But we--"

"Wait!" Now she was the one interrupting. "Just start from the beginning I have to know it all."

My head lazily turned to her. I expected nothing less. I knew I was going to have to tell her absolutely everything, because she wouldn't let me leave if I didn't.

"Alright, well to start, we didn't even end up going to his stupid party," I confessed.

"Why!" she gasped. Little did she know, that was the least important part of the story in comparison to everything else that happened last night.

I swallowed hard. "Well, we started to go and he pulled out this little thing--"

"Don't tell me it was his dick," she spoke over me. "It was small? I can't believe it! Then again, it's always the one you least expect."

"No! It's not small!" I shouted. Her eyes went wide, indicating that she thought I saw it at all. "Just, hold on! Let me finish the story, alright?"

Her eyes were so wide, and she was so intrigued. She probably couldn't believe that the quiet girl she had been best friends with for years even had a story like that one. It was completely out of character.

"Anyways, he pulled out a small box or something with weed. He asked me if I wanted any and I panicked! I said no, and he told me that the party we were going to would have a lot of pot and other drugs so if I didn't feel comfortable going we didn't have to," I said. "I told him I didn't want to go home yet, so instead we went back to his apartment."

She hit my arm excitedly. "Apartment? Oh my god, Kennedy!"

"I know! So anyways, we go back and his apartment is so beautiful, Anna, my explanation won't give it justice. You know those nice apartments not far from my house?" She nodded quickly. "That's where he lives! I couldn't believe it. So, we went inside and we sat on the couch and talked for a while just about everything, and then somehow pot came back up in the conversation and, well, he asked me if I wanted to try and that he was the best person I could do it with. And I did."

"You did?" she shrieked. "I mean, I don't condone drug use but it's just pot."

I could tell her tone was sarcastic, but I continued since I was too excited to stop.

"We smoked for a little while. It wasn't bad. I coughed a lot. But we started laughing and we, um," I gulped. "we started kissing and things got a little--"

"Kennedy, oh my god. What happened! Spit it out!"

I swallowed hard again, finding myself extremely embarrassed. "He, um, he went down on me." My words came out shakily. It was so bizarre to hear myself say those words.

Her jaw dropped. "He did what? Kennedy! What the fuck? Where is all of this coming from? How was it?"

"I don't have anything to compare it to," I confessed, though she was well aware of that. "But, wow. That's all I can actually say. Wow. But after that, we just talked. Hours and hours of talking. Like, I didn't even go to bed yet. I haven't slept since yesterday, Ann. He made me breakfast and we watched a movie and we watched the fucking sunrise together! I don't get it!"

She shook her head. "Jesus, Kennedy. You're fucked."

"Don't say that!" I groaned. "I can't fall for it. You know that. This is probably all routine for him!"

"Maybe," she sighed. "Damn. You had the night of your life, and all I got was a lousy fingering. Can we switch?"

I exhaled hard. "Anna, I can't fall for this. I loved every part of what happened, and I'm afraid. He's so good at this. It's not fair. I'm a virgin when it comes to this shit!"

"Well, technically, you're a virgin to a lot more than just that."

I narrowed my eyes at her.

"Sorry," she raised her hands defensively. "Just remind yourself why you don't like him. Like how he throws these girls around like they're garbage and how he treated you in the beginning like when he was a wiseass with you and how you're too good for his bullshit. This whole thing is for you, and in this relationship, he's secondary for once. He's secondary to you! You're the badass fucking bitch in this story, Kennedy! Be the badass fucking bitch that doesn't fall for his bullshit!"

She was right. The only reason I was continuing anything with Justin in the first place was for a good story. What good would the story be if the main character ended up like everybody else? How predictable would that be?

I couldn't be predictable.

Anna threw her hair up into a high ponytail, then followed by resting her hand on my head. "Kennedy, you're going to show this guy why he can't do this shit anymore. You're the one who is going to stop it. Get in that mindset."

And as motivated as I felt by her words, I couldn't help but think of her words from moments before: "you're fucked."

Oh, I am so fucked.

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a/n: short chapter, kind of a transition-y filler chapter. please vote and comment, it truly makes me want to write for you more and I'd like to get as much in as I can before school starts back up

thanks I love you guys ur awesome (: