Ask Dipper -Gravity Falls

Disturbed Dipwad

Dipper: Alright, folks! This time, I get the first question, since Mabel did every single one last time.

Mabel: Go on, Dipper! I think you'll enjoy this question!

Dipper: Okay, first question from Shooting_tree..."Dipper, is it true that you kissed Waddles's butt--?" What?

Mabel: There is a rumor going around that you kissed his butt, dude!

Dipper: Okay, obviously that's not true. Moving on. Next question.

Mabel: Okay, okay! Next question is once again from Shooting_tree! It says, "Are you over Wendy?"

Dipper: What? Um, o-obviously! She rejected me in that way a l-long time ago, and I'm totally f-fine with it! Definitely. Totally over it.

Mabel: Dipper, your face is seriously, like, the color of my favorite pink sweater! You're totally not over her, are you!?

Dipper: Mabel! W-We've had this discussion before, I'm fine! Next question. It's from the same person, and it reads, "How did school go in California?" Well, it went...fine, I guess.

Mabel: If by "fine" you mean "extremely boring", then you're right!

Dipper: Yeah, you're right, it was really boring. And frustrating. And emotionally scarring.

Soos: Like all trips to the grocery store, it would seem.

Dipper: Uh, were actually talking about school.

Soos: Ah, that makes a little more sense. Later, dudes!

Dipper: Um...right. Anyway, next question!

Mabel: From, you guessed it, Shooting_tree! It says, "How does it feel to possess a sock puppet?"

Dipper: That...definitely isn't something I'd like to relive.

Mabel: Come on, details!

Dipper: It...it felt like you were half asleep. Like, you could think things and see things, but you couldn't...feel things. And when I possessed that sock puppet, I could...feel a bit more, I guess? It was like I was...stuck in between worlds. Long story short, it was very...weird.

Soos: You sure you're not talking about grocery trips, dude?

Dipper: What the...? Yes, Soos, I'm positive.

Soos: Got it. Later, dawg!

Dipper: Oooookay, next question, again, from Shooting_tree. "How many fork wounds did you have after the sock opera?" Oh, several. At least ten. I had to get stitches.

Mabel: Oh, he was fine! After his trip to the hospital, bed rest was all he needed!

Dipper: And I probably could've used some therapy.

Mabel: Well, peeps, looks like we've run out of time! Catch you next time, when Dipper answers more questions that make him feel disturbed and uncomfortable!

Dipper: Thank you for egging them on, Mabel. I love feeling disturbed, that's for sure!

Mabel: Oh, Dipwad! Little do you know your reactions and sarcastic comments are what draw in the creepy comments. Baiiiiiiiii!!!

Dipper: *sigh* Bye.