INSOMNIA

Part 1

I unloaded my shopping cart onto the conveyor belt and waited patiently as the cashier started to scan them. She seemed to be the kind of cashier who had too many annoying customer and was ready to stab the bothersome one with the pen in her breast pocket. In other words, she was the average cashier.

"Hello, did you find everything you were looking for" Her voice came out monotone and robotic as if she had practiced the exact same lime exactly the same way twenty-four hours a day. I had the urge to grab a tank of oil to grease her hinges and joints.

I nodded and chirped in reply "yes, I did, thank you." However, what I actually wanted to say was, your stock of pillows and stuffed animals is very limited. I didn't say it, though, since she already seemed to be having a crappy day.

The cashier nodded slowly. "That's good" she finished scanning the rest of the items and added. "You're total comes to $63.15."

I mentally cringed at the double-digit number. "Debit, please..." My voice trailed off miserably when I saw that wallet only contained twenty-three dollars. And twenty of those twenty-three dollars were actually in various gift cards.

The cashier punched a button on her keyboard with the pad of her fingertip. "Whenever you're ready, insert at the bottom."

I inserted my debit card and pressed the necessary buttons along with entering my pin code. My purchase was approved and the receipt immediately started to print out. I tucked away my debit card in my wallet and sighed. There went my food money for the week. As I exited the store I considered what I would make for dinner. Instant noodles, maybe? I shook off the idea since I'd eaten it the day before. I'd have to make actual food if I was live and not die of malnutrition.

I was already skinny as it was and in desperate need of gaining some fat muscle mass. Lack of sleep didn't exactly provide one with 'model-look'. I prayed that what I bought would help me get some much-needed rest. I took the bus back to my shabby apartment in the shady side of New York City and started getting ready for bed. It was only early evening but with my condition, I could remain awake for hours and going to bed early gave me a higher chance to sleep for a minute or two.

I fluffed up the new pillow I bought and pulled my new blanket out of its thick plastic packaging with a sharp tug. it was a puffy blanket that was silky smooth and smelled rather nice despite that fact that it had been imprisoned in a plastic equivalent of straitjacket. I wrapped it around my slight frame and snuggle into it, enjoying the immediate warmth that surrounded me. Lord have mercy on me since my apartment hardly had adequate heating.

Looking out a nearby small window, I marveled at the light that shone from downtown New York City. It looked as if it was alive and bustling, filled to the brim with people of all different kinds of ethnicity, culture, race, background and religion. And with the way it lit up at night, it truly was the city that never slept.

It was funny in a way. I, a person that never slept, lived in city that never slept. I chuckled to myself at the coincidence and move away from the window. I lied down on my bed and stated up at the ceiling, ready to welcome sleep. Many people wanted to stay awake and did do by drinking coffee or using other methods. I wasn't one of them.

I went even as far as to make weekly appointments with various doctors and specialist in the field of sleep deprivation. I had always wanted to go to a hypnotist but with my current financial ability, it was impossible to pay for a single session without saving up for a long time. New York City also just happened to be one of the most expensive cities in the US and that didn't help. I couldn't move either. I had no money to just pack up and leave and without any sort of plan or any living relatives in the US, I had nowhere to go.