Finally Mine (boyxboy)

Chapter 13: Never again

A/N: I highly encourage you to listen to the song above lol its my favorite right now completely unrelated to the story but yerp. Also, yes the story is going to be rather sad right now and will be for a short while, and there will be hardships, but do not fret it will become happy again eventually :) AAAANNND this is another chapter that switching between various charactors POV's, even jessy's this time. As per usual, it will be specified whos POV a certain part is in before that part starts.

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JASONS POV

Pain. Anguish. Desolation.

These emotions hit my like a runaway train when I awoke the next morning. It was nearly 11 am, and I didn't care.  It seemed Jessy or someone had called both me and JJ in from school, as I noted him sitting by my side still. I tried to say something, but it simply came out as a dry rasp. My throat felt like I had attempted to drink sand, or acid, but it didn't... hurt. It was like all of my physical senses had fled, and they had been replaced by this utter, soul shattering sadness. I had never been this broken... I would never see my parents again... If I had tears left to cry I would have yet again. My face felt taught from all of the salty tears that had streamed down my face, probably even while I slept. My dreams were plagued with the worst type of nightmare one could possibly imagine, and the worst part about it was that when I woke up... the nightmare didn't go away.

I felt like I wanted to give up. Suicide? No. I could never. But I just wanted to be... done. I wanted to lay on this couch forever, and just let myself and the world age, while I thought about the cruelties that we know as reality that existed outside of these walls, the truth that every human has to face... mortality. You don't truly think about how easily a life could be taken.. just a simple thing like an engines failure could take 50 in one fell swoop. 

Life is like fire. It burns hot and bright, it can keep you warm and happy, but if your not careful, you could get burned. You can throw just about anything onto a fire, and it will consume and overpower it. But something as insignificant as water can extinguish the flame just as fast as it was lit without a second of remorse, thought, or care. 

Through my profoundness it felt like I wasn't part of this world anymore. It felt like my body lay there, broken inside, while my conscious was somewhere else, where everything was numb, and total nothingness.  

I would never wish such a feeling upon even my worst enemy. It made any physical pain I had ever felt feel like a tiny prick of a needle. 

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JJ's POV

I awoke to a slight stir next to me, and I look over to see Jason. The sight made my gut wrench, his eyes were glazed over and staring off, into nothingness. He didn't move, it looked like he hardly breathed. 

"Jason...?" I said, not exactly sure what to say. What could you say to someone who just lost both of their parents? People always sympathized with me because I lost my father at a very young age, 6 months old in fact, he was significantly older than my mother and died of a heart attack. But the thing was...  I hardly ever knew him. You  hardly remember anything from when you're that young.. so I couldn't imagine what Jason and Jessy were going through right now.

"Babe... do you need anything?" I continued, and waited a few moments with no answer... I didn't think that he was ignoring me, I honestly think he didn't even actually heard me. I decided to not try to pull conversation out of him at the moment. He looked so...broken. A single tear escaped my eye at the sight, and I leaned forward and kissed him on his forehead. 

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JESSY's POV

I sat there on the love seat with the untouched now cold cup of coffee I had made myself earlier, with my knees to my chest. I stared at the expanse of house around us, a single room about the size of an average single floor house. Our parents always made it feel like home, and it never seemed as big as it did now, seeing as though our parents would always have grandiose party's, and there was always activity buzzing throughout the giant walls of this house. It was welcoming, happy, it was home. But today it felt very different. I felt intimidated by the size, it seemed as if the giant marble pillars that extended up to the ceilings loomed over me, taunting me with memories of what was and what could never be again. The giant fireplace plagued me with memories, Christmas morning all of us gathering in the giant living room at the ass crack of dawn, Jason and our parents always loved Christmas so much, and would get up before the sun in order to run out into the giant living room, Christmas songs rang throughout the halls, you could never sleep when they where up on Christmas morning. And it was always so beautiful... always decorated in gold linens and white, with splashes of red throughout. Christmas was in about a month, and it hit me hard that we would never have a Christmas like that ever again. Never again would we see our parents cuddling by the fire after another successful Christmas day... Or to taste moms mediocre cooking... She never really was that good of a cook, we had personal chefs most of the time, but on Christmas she always tried, and we all acted like we loved it to make her happy. These memories actually caused a bit of a smile to dance across my face. 

I heard JJ say something to Jason, and it seemed like Jason didn't even hear him. Jason eyes looked dead, and it sent a shudder of terror through my spine, it was almost as if I was looking at my brothers corpse. He was totally catatonic..

For a moment however, my worries were eased as JJ leaned forward to give him a kiss on the head, and just for a moment, his eyes lit up with the life and love that is Jason Hester again, and he seemed to relax a bit at JJ's touch subconsciously., and I honestly could not be more grateful for JJ to be here to help him through this.