Flatmate(Septiplier)

16

Jack starts walking into his small livingroom and back to the kitchen. He starts to look at the ceiling and feels like he's losing his mind, like he's half alive, like the only things existing right now is his body and his inside, which is slowly dying as if it wants to disappear. To leave his damaged self. It's not right. He feels like he's doing something wrong. It never feels right, it never stops. Feeling of guilt and pain in his chest. He feels weak and helpless.

But he doesn't need help anyways. He doesn't deserve it, neither is anyone able to help him. It's difficult to speak to him. It's difficult to understand him.

He wants his thoughts to be destroyed. None of those negative, destructively thoughts anymore. But it's not possible. He's in his own deep hole since such a long time and he can't get out. If someone would ever try to help him out, they wouldn't reach his hand. And Jack wouldn't give his hand either. He simply doesn't want to be a burden. He's the most burden to himself.

He's leaning against the wall and his brain is full of voices telling him things he already knows. All of a sudden he decides, Jack decides to at least try to defend himself. Enough. Enough. Enough.
"Fuck, shut up!", he yells and stares blankly at the wall. "Shut the hell up, you disgusting..." He doesnt know who he's talking to. Himself probably. Once at all he hesitates, touches his cheek, feels a tear. Another tear. The things that make him stutter is also his own voice. He didn't hear it in a long time. He doesn't talk to himself usually. Just when he decides to fight against himself, which is only now, for the first time, he hears his too high voice. It didn't change much.

"I'm not obligated to listen to you. So leave me alone", Jack whispers and cries inaudibly. He also didn't cry for a while.
He wouldn't say it got too much right now. It gets too much in his head a lot.
From the lonely, hidden, silent boy he's always been during the time in this appartment, he suddenly is making really slow progress. Slow, but it's progress anyways... Isn't it? Jack is confused. All the years isolated from society, and now this.

He doesn't have a clue why he's crying or why he's talking again. It just happens.