Shoey : I will always never not love you

Joeys pov:

"Dear joey, I'm not sure how long it's been since the last time I saw your gorgeous face, that beautiful hair, and your rough muscles. Truely, I miss you. That's kind of hard to believe, I know. I have treated you so terribly the last 4 in a half years of our marriage. I've treated our children (Alex and gage) poorly too, but you joey, were the best father they could possibly ever ask for in anyone's life. They were silly, goofy and adorable just like you. I'm not sure of they remember me because they were very young, and I was always gone 24/7 directing. I was all over the place joey, I couldn't handle not seeing my family's face hardly ever. I never saw the kiddos cause I was usually home all night with you 3 times a month until 2am in the morning. Every time I saw your face when I got up to leave it got sadder and sadder every time I saw you until your expression totally gave up. All I saw was, "Shane, I'm used to it." And every time I saw that expression I died a little inside...until I actually died. I figured that if I was never going to see you and my kids, why not never see you? It's sort of the same thing you see? So that last night of our time together, I made the most out of it. I told you I loved you and gave you a special gift. Do you remeber? It said, "I'll never not love you" on a necklace. When you received the gift, you teered up in joy and we hugged for what felt like forever. Then we kind of made out for awhile too. After that I Relized I was late and had to get going. Your smile instantly turned into a frown. Your voice got quite and you said, "ok.." My heart sank and I hugged you and put your necklace on. I kissed you and said, "Remember, I will always never not love you." You smiled brightly and watched me walk away not knowing it was the last time you would see my face and not knowing those would be my last words. As I drove I went as far as possible. I picked up my spare gun that I kept in the car and thought to myself, "I will ALWAYS love him." Then I shot myself. It was over. I'm not sure what it felt like because I was gone, you know? But your also possibly curious how I wrote this. I wrote it that night I gave you the necklace also. You were showering. I thought you would probably want to know where I have gone and what happened to me so I wrote this. I also want you to know, Joey Graceffa, that I will always never not love you."

End of Shane's pov.