Dolan twins imagines

Your final goodbye pt.2; g.d

I'm gonna do a part two bc ppl were asking me to so here it goes..
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Grayson's pov
*Three years later*
It's been three years since y/n has committed suicide. There's not have gone a day I don't think about her. Today is her birthday I have celebrated it without her for two years. I don't even care about life anymore. I just want to be with her, I miss her so fucking much. The day she took her life I have changed everyone says I have. How can I even live without her, it's fucking impossible.
All I can blame are my fucking "fans" they made her do this. I stopped posting, Ethan has as well. We both deleted our twitter and Instagram accounts. Ethan and I have stoped YouTube. Ethan is depressed too, he lost his best friend, he talked to her about stuff I didn't know about. My "fans" apologize all the time I still get letters from them saying they are sorry but if they were y/n would still be here celebrating her fucking 20th birthday happy and alive,with me, with her family and friends. Everyone adored her so much. She was and still is the love of my life. I can't and won't forget about her ever.
Everyone to this day is still in shock. Her mom started doing drugs, her parents got a divorce, her dad is just sleeping around he can't love anymore. Her 15 year old sister is depressed, cutting, she starves herself. Her brother 11 year old brother is getting bullied and cries himself to sleep.
She was so beautiful. The way her hair falls down her shoulders and the way her eyes light up in the sun. The way her lips were so kissable and sweet. The way her body is just so gorgeous. I remember our first time, the way it was so passionate and sexy full with love. It wasn't just sex for me nor her. The way her smile lights up the whole room, The way she makes everyone laugh and smile. The way she lights up the whole room when she walked in. I miss her touch and the way I used to crave it, I still do. The way her laugh sounded it was so weird yet so beautiful and contagious. I remember she hated her laugh, it was so beautiful and yet she was so unaware of it. The way she would wake me up in the middle of the night at 2am or I'll wake her up because of a night mare that we broke up and we didn't live each other anymore and we would just hold each other like it was the last day we would. I'm was and so so very much I'm love with her. I still look at her picture and I still smell her clothes and I can still smell her favorite perfume. I still go to her grave everyday, I don't miss a day because I feel that it's disrespectful. Every time I go I leave her favorite flower daisies.
Gosh I miss her so much. I can still feel her presence. I know she's here with me. I know she hasn't left me yet. I know she's here I can feel it, sometimes when I turn to her side of the bed in the middle of the night I can see her face clearly staring back at me and whispering "I love you" caressing my cheek until I fall asleep. She used to do that when I couldn't go to sleep. I still have videos of her on my phone, I just watch them back to back all day and night. I'll never get tired of looking at them i'll just cry. Gosh two years has gone past and I don't even dare to look at someone else. I can't move on. Y/n has had such a big impact on my life. Nobody can compare to her, she's perfect. I have never loved someone so much ever in my entire life. I will never forget her. I love her so much "I'll see you in heaven babygirl"

A/n: damn this shit was deep.
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byee loves❤