Like We Used To

 Intermission 

Author's POV 

"Kendall...are you ok? You look pale and..." Logan realised there was no answer from Kendall, Logan asked him again a little louder."Kendall, are you alright?" shocked, Kendall jerked little bit from the sudden voice that came to his right. He ignored the dizziness that had been bothering him now for a couple of months. Kendall flinched when someone touched his shoulder, turning around and finding Logan standing in front of him with his anxious look on his face.

"I'm fine.. I-I'm just little bit tired, that's all." Kendall interrupted sharply, then sighed heavily.

Logan stared at Kendall carefully, he knew that kendall was hiding something from him because he had known Kendall for long time and in this case, Logan guessed it easily.

"You can tell me anything..." Logan sighed then he took a few steps closer to Kendall but when Kendall realised what Logan did, he immediately took a large step back.

Logan raised his eyebrows because of that. He got worried, holding his hands up in a sort of surrender.

"I'm not gonna hurt you, see?"

Yeah I know you won't, Logan. And I can tell you anything and everything just like I did before, but for this one, I guess you will not understand. Or help me out of this shit!

Kendall started to speak, running his hand through his hair in a nervous gesture "Look, I'm fine..ok? Like what I told you I-I'm just tired. Our rehearsal is so damn hard and I just..I mean with the little time we have off? Seriously? And I think you know that.." Kendall paused in his sentence, he hate being a liar, but this time he had to do it.

Logan looked at Kendall for a while before he let out a short breath of annoyance and gave up. He knew it was useless arguing with such a stubborn person like Kendall Donald Knight.

"I just want to remind you that there are no secrets between us. Camille and I had been dating for a couple of months now and I'm going out with Camille tonight. I'm just letting you know about this, m-maybe this is our second chance to start the relationship all over again. She asked me out and I'm giving it a try" Kendall looked at logan with a disappointed look crossing over his face, but soon he shrugged his shoulders as if he didn't care

"I thought we had talked about this before. You can go with anyone and I guess you can't forget about her?" Kendall gave off a small, fake laugh to try to hide his feelings, but Logan's eyes widened. He could not believe what was Kendall had said.

"Yeah! You know what Kendall? You're right! I do still love her! I can't stop thinking about her, I want her and I need her more than anything in the world!" Logan cried, sweeping his hair with his fingers before taking his head in his hands.

Suddenly, Kendall felt more dizziness coming to him. He felt so weak and he thought he would collapse at anytime, therefore he sustained his body with help off the wall. He groaned softly as he supported his body against the wall. But he was grateful because Logan didn't notice it.

"I don't understand, Kendall...I-I don't even know you anymore. What's wrong with you!? What happen to you!? YOU'RE A SLUT!" Logan stopped, opening and closing his mouth like he didn't know what to say.

"I'm fucking tired and I'm getting sick of your behaviour!" Logan cried out suddenly in anger. He can't take it anymore. His heart was hurting so badly. His mind couldn't think clearly this time.

"Now it's up to you, Kendall. It's your choice.. Oh My God, YOU FUCK!" Logan raised his tone this time.

"M-Maybe Camille is the best for me and knows me better than you do! You're just my PAST AND NOTHING MORE..!"

Hearing that, Kendall immediately pushed himself away from the wall with his hands, forcing himself to stay strong as he walked toward the door.

"I don't think there's anything else we need to talk about anymore. You can go now..." Kendall said as he opened the door without looking back to where Logan was.

Logan sighed.

"I'm Just... just letting you know, Kendall." Logan said in weak voice. Logan stomped over to Kendall, pushing him hard at the shoulder and walking out, closing the door with a loud bang

Kendall's POV

"Just...just letting you know, Kendall." Logan said in weak voice.

My heart ached, everything that I saw was doubling. I tried to stand up straight and pretend that there's nothing wrong with me but it's hard right now and I can't even focus my vision at the moment.

When I lifted my head, one thing that I knew was Logan had been right in front of me and pushed me hard, and then just left me without a word, closing the door with a loud bang

I jolted at the sound. I stood still against the door with tears staining my face. My heart was hurting, my body was trembling, it was just so wrong. Everything had been destroyed, my life was shattered and Logan hated me. I should blame myself for this. Logan's right, I'm a slut so why would Logan care about me? I don't deserve him.

I'm afraid. I was confused. The burden is so heavy for me, I can't bear it by myself. I wanted to tell Logan what had happened, but what if Logan would get mad at me? What if Logan won't take responsibility for it because the news would ruin his life?

The tears could no longer be detained in my eyes. The tears were slowly becoming sobs ripped from my throat.

My legs were getting weak, my body shaking hard as my body fell to the floor slowly.

Logan, what should I do? With hating me, it will make you feel better? Even I don't know how I should tell you about what's happened to me. I'm pregnant and it's your baby, Logan.

My mind and my burden made me stress out to a point where my stomach started to cramp...again for the umpteenth time.

I hugged and squeezed my belly with grimace trying to calm it down, but I only cried out in pain. I slept with my body position slightly curved to the side.

The cold floor couldn't prevent my sweat to not come out. I began to try to regulate my breathing and calm my mind. But the pain was getting worse and all I could remember was darkness