Finish what you started.
Today marked the third year of my college years. In few months, I’ll be a fourth year student pursuing my degree in Computer Engineering. I was enjoying the journey with my classmates. Overnight projects, unplanned trips, midterms, exams and friendship. Everything was going smoothly until I failed one subject. Circuits Analysis I. It changed my perception about failure. I was in denial to say “it was fine”, but it wasn’t. My parents didn’t even scold me much. However for some reason, I lost interest in doing my best. I felt discouraged and hurt. I ate all the unhealthy food in the earth. Still, it hurts. But as they say, time heals all wounds. I got over it. Scratch that. I’m getting over it… until now. I can barely accept the fact that I’m having summer classes for the first time in my life. Good bye vacation! Hello, money! That was my only motivation: money. Due to this incident, I thought a lot of what the future might bring. Will I be successful? Will I graduate? And stuffs. Then, muttered that I can’t worry about something that hasn’t occurred yet. Wasting my time worrying would lead me nowhere so I gave myself another chance to stand and prove that I can be better. I am doing well with my subjects, passed examinations and complete homework. Until one day, I had a dream.
“Will you be happy?” a hollow voice said to my sleep.
“Do you like computers?”
“Do you enjoy what you’re doing?”
“Can you live your whole life doing computers?”
The voice kept repeating itself like a mantra. It waked the hell out of me leaving me clueless if I made the right choice. As a matter of fact, I am still undecided about the track I’m taking. When we were asked to choose a course, I don’t really care what to take. I just wanted a course that will give me tons of bucks! Ridiculous! Right? Then last week, realization came. I knew what I wanted. I yearn for studying languages. I should’ve taken up linguistics or Tourism. Nevertheless, it’s too late. I’m already in third year college. I should finish what I started, be uptight to my decisions, and exclude myself to those who say “What should have been?”. There is no room for regret. Just moving forward. :)
