The Tale Continues (Saiunkoku Monogatari Fanfiction: Ryuuki x Shuurei lemon)

Chapter 93: Confession

''Why do we have to come here? We just need to talk right?'' Jyuusan complained when Seiran brought her inside his mansion. ''I want to go home now and have a warm bath.''

''It's cold outside. It would be my fault if you get sick,'' Seiran reasoned out. ''I'll just prepare dinner. Please feel free to make yourself comfortable. You can use the bath if you want. The servants have placed lots of clothes for you in your room,'' he continued.

''Huh? Why do we have to have dinner? I want to go home already,'' Jyuusan mused.

''It would be rude of me not to serve my guest well right?'' Seiran said and went to the kitchen. 'If this is the last time you come in my mansion then I have to at least treat you good right?' Seiran sadly thought.

Jyuusan glared at the door Seiran just exited from. She wondered why he is being so kind. She decided that she'd take a bath since she's all sweaty from training. She was surprised when she went to the room she slept in last time and found the drawers filled with clothes which exactly fits her. All of it are blue. 'Why does all of this seem to be really sized for me?' she thought as she checked the clothes. She wondered if Seiran sized her up since he had seen her naked more than thrice now.

She looked around the room. It was set up for a woman now. The beddings, the covers, there are even makeup kits for women, jewelry and hairpins. 'What the heck is going on?' She wondered if this is someone else's room but Seiran had said this is her room. All the clothes and beddings are shades of blue too. It's really meant for her since she is a Ran clan princess. She took a bath wondering why the room looked like she is actually living there. Everything is provided.

After taking a bath she was back in the room beside Seiran's, which seems to have turned to be called as really her room now, when she heard someone knock. ''Jyuusan-hime (Princess Jyuusan), Lord Seiran says dinner is ready,'' a lady in waiting said.

''Please tell him I am on my way,'' Jyuusan replied. 'I see, so he is really called as lord Seiran even by his servants,' she thought.

''Yes Madam,'' the servant said and left.

''This delicious!'' Jyuusan appraised when they started eating dinner. Somehow she had tasted it before. When was it? Ah, when Seiran brought her food when she just left last time when her brother came. ''Don't tell me you also cooked the one you gave me last time?'

''I did.'' Seiran smiled proudly at her compliment.

''I didn't know you are such a good cook,'' Jyuusan said.

''I told you I was the one who thought Shuuei and he is a good cook now too,'' he mused.

''I see. By the way, why is the room I slept in before looking like that? It's filled with stuff for women,'' Jyuusan inquired.

''The ladies-in-waiting insisted so I let them do as they please,'' Seiran answered with a smile.

''The clothes are exactly my size,'' she said with a suspicious look at him.

Seiran chuckled. ''It wasn't me. The ladies in waiting seems to have sized you up the first time you were here and just rechecked it when you came again.'' Only after dinner did Seiran start to talk about what they are supposed to talk about.

Jyuusan blushed as she received a single red rose that Seiran picked for her. Seiran is giving her an intense gaze as he handed it to her. Her heart fluttered as the single rose and the look in his eyes seemed to say 'I love you deeply'.

''T-thank you. It's beautiful,'' Jyuusan said as she smelled the rose. It was freshly picked and it smelled good. They sat side by side by the window of Seiran's room while looking up at the moon and the stars.

Seiran saw a firefly and it reminded him of something. ''Hotaru,'' he said in a soft but distant voice that sounded loud in the silence and pain in it is eminent that it surprised Jyuusan so much. Her eyes widened as she instantly looked at Seiran.

''What did you just say?'' Jyuusan said as she gawked at him.

''It's a nice name. I see that it really is very dear to you,'' Seiran said with a smile that did not reach his eyes. ''You could have told me that you have someone else. I wouldn't have done anything to you if you have told me you were just following orders and that you love someone else.'' He said those with eyes that looked up at the faraway stars. He could not look at her. He is far too sad to let her see his eyes. He felt like even if she is right here beside her, she is as far away as the stars he is looking up to now. She is but a dream. Now he knew how Ryuuki really felt as he talked with Shuurei knowing fully well that his hope is dire.

Jyuusan stared at him with panicked eyes. ''It's not like that,'' she denied. She wanted to say more but she suddenly felt so cold like she is being frozen alive that even her voice faltered her.

''I saw you with him the other day. You two looked so happy. I was glad that I could see you smile and laugh so carelessly like that,'' he continued as he looked at the sky as if he is seeing them there. Seiran finally looked at her in the eye and said, ''I want you to be happy Jyuusan and if being Hotaru is what makes you happy then please, stop pretending and go to him,'' Seiran said honestly and smiled but it's a sad smile.

Jyuusan felt like she had just been stabbed. 'He is letting me go? He is giving up on me,' she mournfully thought. Then she realized something and it made her feel pained even more. Tears stung her eyes and it quickly flowed down to her cheeks.

Seiran wiped her tears with his thumb. His hands felt cold. And his eyes looked so lonely and sad. ''I – I'm sorry. I'm sorry,'' Jyuusan said as she sobbed and Seiran hugged her to his chest. ''I'm sorry Seiran. I'm sorry.''

''It's not your fault. I know that Setsuna must have sent you here to Kiyou years ago when he knew Jin came since he wanted the two of you to meet again. Now that everything is alright, you can be together now, finally,'' he said as he stroked her hair. This may be the last time he could hug her and stroke her hair.

''You don't need to get stuck with a sadistic beast like me anymore. Go to Jin,'' Seiran said in a gentle voice despite the pain in his chest. Jyuusan is hugging him tight and she is crying to him asking for forgiveness but not just that.

''Please do what will make you happy. Stop following that order and stay with Jin. I want to see you smiling and laughing that way again. I want you to be happy Jyuusan,'' Seiran said and Jyuusan slowly looked up to him when she felt something drop to her shoulders.

Jyuusan saw something that dumbfounded her. ''You say that but . . . why are you crying Seiran?'' she said in a voice which is almost a whisper.

Seiran was surprised. He touched his cheek and wondered why there are tears that wetted his fingers. ''Why am I?'' he did not even notice he is crying too. When did he last cry? Or rather, have he ever cried before? 'Are this tears really mine?' he thought. But then he could no longer hide what he really felt. The pain is killing his chest. He hugged Jyuusan tight as he cried too. He just wanted to hold her close like this, forever.

Jyuusan could not believe herself. She made the always composed Prince Seien cry and sob. She wondered if Shuurei had ever seen Seiran like this. He is holding her tight. So tight that it is almost painful, except that she wanted to be held tight by this person.

''Jyuusan, I really wanted you to be happy,'' Seiran repeated in a shaky voice. ''But I cannot help feeling this way if I'll never be with you again. I would never forget the times we spent together. I will never forget how warm you felt. This feeling inside me would not fade even if I cannot see you here in this mansion again,'' he said with tears still running down his face.

''I still want you Jyuusan. I still want you to be mine. But if you are not really happy with me. You're better off with Jin,'' he let go of Jyuusan and she trembled as more tears spilled from her eyes. She didn't want him to let go of her. ''I – I love you Jyuusan,'' Seiran said with all his heart as he lovingly caressed her cheek. He was finally able to say how he really felt about her.

Next Chapter: Last Night Together