If ...

Chapter 24

Kendall POV

I need to get out of this apartment . Everything is scrumbling down . Everything is getting worse .

I head to my room pull tight jeans on and a plain t-shirt . I let my almost dry hair fall on my shoulders and grab my keys , phone and wallet .

I have no idea where I am going , but one thing I know is that it has to be anywhere but this apartment .

Hurrying down the stairs I open the main door and get out .

I take a deep inhale of the refreshing cold air and begin to walk ,not knowing where to go .

I have been walking for more than half an hour my feet have begin to slightly ache .

I look around and notice a shiny sign hanging on the top of a shop . A bar .

I have never been in a bar before nor did I ever think that I would be entering one . Alone .

But I need this .

I get into the small bar , the smell of alcohol and sweat hits me and I crinkle my nose at the not so pleasing smell .

I pull a chair and lean on the counter trying to convince myself to get out before I do something wrong .

I have never drank . Only wine at dinner sometimes . Other than that . Never .

Before I could decide whether to ask for a drink a glass filled with transparent liquid is placed in front of me and the bartender point at a young man sitting at the other end of the counter .

If It was in any other circumstances I would have declined , heck I wouldn't even be here . But for now I accept the drink and smile at the man .

I take the drink in my hand and tilt my head back gulping all of it .

I feel the alcohol making it way down my throat burning it on its way .

My vision goes blurry for a moment and tingles takes over my body .

It's a nice feeling .

" Give me another " I ask the bartender , he looks surprised by how fast I drank the previous cup but fills me another one .

I do the same for this one and the one after it . I know I'm drunk at the end of my fourth , or is it my fifth cup ? I don't know but I 'm liking this . Numbness . I am numb to the world .

I am a lighter drinker than I thought .

I feel warm and i'm sure my cheeks are flushed . I wish I wasn't here alone . I grab my phone and It slips from my hand and lands straight on the floor .

"Woops !" I giggle and the bartender who seems entertained by the american drunk girl at one in the evening shakes his head.

I put my phone in my ear and wait for someone to answer .

"Hello ? "

"Heeeeello " I giggle

"kendall ? " he asks trying to make sure that it's me . Wait who is this ?

" That's my name , who are you ? " I spin the drink who seems to be a straight vodka in my cup .

"Jesus . Are you drunk ?" His voice is full with irritation .

"Noope I am not drunk , I am kendall " I look closely at the small spot on the counter who is moving now

"Fucking hell . Where are you ? " he asks

Where am I ?

"Mother earth " I say and finish my - well I lost count of the numbers of cups I had

"Fuck you're hammered . Can you give the phone to someone who isn't drunk " he sighs through the phone

I look around and call " someone who isn't drunk ! " no one answers but the bartender looks like he is having the time of his life .

I wonder why ...

"Someone who isn't drunk you here ?" I call again

"Jesus kendall " I hear the man on the phone says . I still don't know who he is

"Who are you again ? " I ask and gulp the drink the very nice bartender served me .

" fuck . Would you stop drinking . Jesus Christ , give the phone to this fuckhead who is still serving you " the mean man speaks

" nope . Not until you tell me who you are " I shake my head

" Kendall i'm cristiano ronaldo the famous player and the guy who you despise since this morning , now would you please give the phone to that dickhead of a bartender who is still serving you "

Cristiano Ronaldo ? Player ? I don't know .

"Okay" I shrug and give the nice guy who's name turned to be bartender .

"Bartender , Cristiano Ronaldo wants to talk to you " I push the phone into his face and swirl a loose strand of hair .

After bartender ended the call he tossed me my phone back .

"Your night in shining armour is coming " he says a smirk playing on his lips

"Really ?" I squeak

"You are a very entertaining drunk " he chuckles

"No i'm not drunk , i'm kendall " I pout

He chuckles

"I need another one " I point to the cup in my hands

"No can do . Sorry but I like my job " he refuses

"Really ? Tell me about this my job , is she cute ? " I put my hand under my chin and wait for his response

He lets a loud laugh . A contagious one and I find myself laughing too .

I can't bring myself to stop laughing , my stomach has began to ache from the furious fit of laughter and my eyes are screwed shut .

I feel ... light . I don't know what's this feeling but it's very pleasant . My cheeks are flushed and warm , eyes  watery , lungs  fully filled with air , head light and my heart is ... full .

I wish I can stay like this . I'm sick of the heart ache that is always following me wherever I go .

A voice pulls me out of my dazzed state

"Holy fuck ! Kendall you okay ? "

Okay ? I look around me and

"Oh i'm on the floor " how did I end up on the floor ?

I look up and starts laughing again .

Numbness or whatever this state and this feeling is , is my new favorite place to be in .